Flat Earther claims NASA is pushing belief in ETs so that when Jesus comes back, we'll shoot him

Remix of Project Blues Beam.

I think the only people that might shoot Jesus would be christians. Most folks wouldn’t feel threatened by a hippie looking guy preaching about feeding the poor and loving each other.

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Wait a minute…Last time, the general consensus was that the earth WAS flat. And Jesus claimed he was “not of this world”, they thought he was human and killed him anyway. So, either way he’s screwed.

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Download

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No wonder it has such weird fauna.

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Yeah, but also…

dog-cat-australia

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“Everybody knows… the world is full of stupid people…”
– The Refreshments (‘Banditos’)

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Don’t kid yourself, buddy. If there was a Second Coming, you know you wouldn’t hesitate to shoot Jesus straight away.

“… this guy said he used to contract with Nasa.”

If true at all, he may have simply been a stockroom clerk in a company that supplied nuts and bolts to one of the NASA test facilities.

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A Canadien: Yo! Hungry here! That piece on top of the USA is too small!

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Oh please. This isn’t a Mercator projection.

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Talk to that Canadien — not me.

It’s not like they drill every potential contractor who provides goods and services to NASA on their personal belief systems. The interview was probably like “are you a certified structural welder with at least 5 years experience doing TIG work?” or “what is your previous experience in the catering industry?”

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I am pretty Jesus won’t come back. I think He will hire a bunch of expensive lawyers and sue a lot of people.

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This is nothing new to me. Back when I was a child, being raised in an Evangelical home, my mother outright told me that science fiction was a Satanic conspiracy to make people discredit miracles.

Why does Star Trek have a transporter? So when the rapture happens the media can just say aliens beamed all the extremist Christians away to re-educate them to be less hateful.

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He would have to hire them through Lucifer who’s got a serious lock on that particular group.

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Hmmm. This is the plan B. Their masterplan is way more complicated.

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This is kind of batshit even among a field of batshit “theories”.

How does the shape of the planet supposedly influence people’s reaction to Mr. Second coming of Jesus/Alien?

I mean it would be equally valid to theorize that we say that the Earth is an obloid sphere so that when Jesus comes back, people aren’t surprised and present him with gifts of free entree passes to the local strip club.

Or maybe just maybe, everyone’s trying to convince us that the Earth isn’t a cube, so we don’t realize that Jesus is actually a reincarnated dinosaur who is coming to teach us how to time travel! ← this one’s definitely the correct theory…

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Cat food or a hairball?

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