Florida Walmart shopper pleasures himself upon stuffed horse


#1

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#2

When will the persecution of Brony Love end?


#3

So… They’ll be putting the horse on clearance I assume? Opened item?


#4

Much like the Chicken Lady?


#5

I feel like someone should mention that that stuffed horse certainly dressed like it wanted to be masturbated upon.


#6

Florida Man continues to be worst superhero ever.


#7

I feel that I could have done without the word “into”. Just sayin’.


#8

Exactly, before we pass judgement it would be nice to know just how sexy this horse was – or perhaps he is a victim of sexyflandersphilia (everything looks like sexy Flanders)


#9

It makes sense. Faced with the existential horror that is WalMart, some desperately seek whatever pleasure they can.


#10

Florida - check
Walmart - check


#11

Other items were contaminated and could not be sold.

Must have been a good one.


#12

Guy’s black. How come he’s not dead?


#13

His gun was clearly unloaded and no longer in his hand at the time of arrest. He presented no risk to the arresting officers as neither were filled with stuffing.


#14

Whitest looking black guy ever!

(the mug shot of Sean Johnson)

But… As much as it is fun to giggle at the weird story, I can’t help but to feel sorry for a person who is obviously mentally ill enough to consider whacking it in a store with a stuffed horse. Can’t imagine that his future holds a lot of good things in it…


#15

Give the man a unicorn chaser?


#16

Of the kind that used to live in Second Life? http://alphavilleherald.com/2007/09/afternoon-delig.html


#17

Ivor Biggun’s relaunch hasn’t gone to plan then? (Link is probably NSFW)


#18

at least he had the good sense to go to the bedding department, i mean it was either that or the shower supplies or mens socks …am i right…lol.

I like the title of the click through story:

I’m picturing a stuffed horse masturbating side by side next to his new buddy…and turning to him and saying man those mushrooms were good. :slight_smile:


#19

I see this at the link:


#20

You both need to go somewhere to think long and hard about your behavior here. (snerk)