Flying Spaghetti Monster hate mail

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Boy howdy, all these people sound like they would be great to sit next to for an hour every week.

Why aren’t more Christians, well, Christian? With that whole turn the other cheek thing and bringing peace to the conversation instead of being so agro?

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They’re like children on a school yard. Except they’re adults, with adult abilities and problems and responsibilities.

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Some folks, they just take themselves far too seriously.

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Supposedly Mark Twain said he didn’t like to go to church because the only person he could stand to listen to for that long was himself.

I’ve gotta say I could listen to these folks for quite a while. “I hope you die by the hands of some sick perverted guy who will skullfuck you and then use your skin to make lampshades” is poetry, pure poetry.

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I don’t see any reason to assume that.

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Shitty pastors.

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“And if you don’t believe exactly what we believe, or if you don’t take us absolutely seriously, then God will inflict hideous tortures on you in a place called Hell … FOREVER! Now, which part of ‘God is love’ did you say you were having trouble understanding again?”

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It looks like the current FSM hate mail is here:

(“Current” being a relative term; the newest update is from last November and the one before that from 2011.)

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It’s always shocking what “good” people will do, if they’re in a position free of accountability. It’s quite possible, they’re seemingly decent people, outside of their internet superhero alter egos.

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My cats a Minister of the church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. He presided over my marriage to my wife. First hominids married by a Feline as far as I know.

We’ve come so far. :slight_smile:

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“people like you are scum, I hope you die by the hands of some sick perverted guy who will skullfuck you and then use your skin to make lampshades.”

This guy clearly knows his Biblical history, I think that was one of the lines the First Council of Nicaea edited out of the Beatitudes.

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Most of the atheists on my life now far more about the religions they left than most of the believers do.

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“Charles Darwin went insane when he was 28 anyways (didn’t know that did you?) Let me put it this way to you concerning your bologna flying spaghetti monster. If we are created in the image of what you believe God to be, we would look like spaghetti.”

Damn! He makes a good point. I am starting to waver on this whole religion thing, because It’s hard to fight logic like that. I got some thinking to do.

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I’ve never understood this line of religious reasoning:
“If you don’t believe in our mythology, our mythology says that terrible things will happen to you! Doesn’t that scare you into believing in it?”

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Sounds more like leaving your brain at the door and picking up your crayons.

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That’s how people become athiests.

Once you get it it’s just impossible to believe it.

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Remember they are conditioned to react to differences in opinions like normal people react to threats of bodily harm.

Trying to tempt them from their faith is worse then trying to corrupt their precious bodily fluids!

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