Fuck Elon Musk (Part 1)

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I. Can’t. Even.

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You just know that the fanboys would be queueing up to get their brains scooped out if EM did this.

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So where’s the hook?

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Colin Jost Shrug GIF by Saturday Night Live

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Season 10 Richardlewis GIF by Curb Your Enthusiasm

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…That’s not billionaires being just like us, subtitle. I think most of us are better than that.

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Must be a self-report by whoever wrote it

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Dear, Dog! Can’t he just keep his dick in his pants? And does he do any actual work? If I had any stock in SpaceX, Tesla or Neuralink, I’d sell immediately.

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Elon Musk-adjacent Tesla Bro humor:

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It’s on: Twitter vs Elon Musk trial to start October 17

[…]

Twitter’s lawyers filed a lawsuit in Delaware against the world’s (currently) richest man, seeking damages and more, and urged judges to expedite the case and set a trial date for September. The hearing has now officially been set for Monday, October 17 to 21 [PDF]. Legal teams representing both sides will have to finalize documents, and select expert witnesses over the next coming months.

Judge Kathaleen McCormick, Chancellor of Delaware’s Court of Chancery, warned both parties to work together in good faith. But just days before, Musk accused Twitter of trying to push the court trial date a week earlier to October 10 and accused its lawyers of not cooperating. Twitter, however, denied this and said Musk’s team haven’t been all that helpful either.

[…]

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Goddamn, this almost makes me feel bad for him. Almost.

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I would have thought that Elon’s dad was too busy having children with his stepdaughter to pay any more attention to Elon than Elon does to his children

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Errol Musk chastised his son for “eating badly” in light of those recent vacation photos

I don’t think diet is responsible for his weird pale body. That looks like a matter if genetics, or maybe that white powder his acolytes ritualistically cover him in every time he prepares to venture into the wastelands.

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Maybe if Elon behave himself, he can get a step-granddaughter. /s

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Sweeney says that Musk has frequently flown from Los Angeles International Airport to Hawthorne Airport—a six-mile distance and a ten-minute drive apart, making for a roughly five-minute flight.

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how the? you can’t taxi and take off that fast.

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