I have a very particular way of dealing with loneliness: I find someone who I think would be a good match, and I look forward to that relationship. I don’t always act, though I always tell myself I will. I know it’s not exactly healthy, but it’s better than the alternative, at least in the short-term.
Anyway, it’s been a couple of weeks since my latest dreams were dashed, and I think it’s finally sunk in, because the loneliness is attacking again. The last time it happened, I had my writing to channel it into, but right now, all I have is self-reflection.
So I’m retreating into myself and spending way too much time reading, which has always been my reflex in difficult times. That should hold me over until I get out of this tunnel and back into the sunlight again. It always does. Still not a nice sensation, though.
Plus, I’ve got this really annoying cough at the moment. Stupid cough.
16 Likes
I don’t know, but I am so sick to death of the guy. I’m sick of seeing his face everywhere, I’m sick of all those articles “destroying” him over the last year or so, and I’m sick of the parodies and jokes about him. I just want to wake up one day and not see people talking about him for once. The guy is just offensive to me to the extent that I like myself less in the ways that I look like him and people like him.
I don’t know if there is any way to successfully remove him from office, but I think we should focus more on other things. Some of you know that I am ambivalent about abortion to some extent, but I’ve just made a donation to Planned Parenthood. They do a lot of amazing work and can credibly claim to be pro-life in ways that many “pro-life” people can’t, and I’d say this is one of the “First they came for the Communists” moments. I think the next four years are going to be miserable and even if Trump was successfully removed, I don’t think that would change the reality that it’s far from just him who is wanting to roll back many fundamental human rights. I can only hope that voters see sense and show solidarity with each other by the time his term is up.
20 Likes
I’m sorry. Maybe you’re not ready to date, in this case? It sounds like you still have an awful lot to work through with your last relationship?
Where was this?
11 Likes
Boston, Fanuel Hall, ACA Rally.
I actually had set a timer on dating, was going to wait at least two more weeks. As for issues, it’s more that I got blindsided by someone who I didn’t believe was so aggressively boundary crossing (aka toxic) - which has opened some old wounds more so than created new ones. But yeah, clearly not dating just now. Thanks!
11 Likes
I didn’t mean to come off as condescending, so sorry. I don’t think the “issues” are your fault, clearly they aren’t.
9 Likes
awww, no worries, you didn’t. When I am sitting with a coffee across from a fellow lovely human and all I can think about is what someone else entirely who is not going to show up, said six months earlier, I’m gonna go ahead and own that as an issue. Not a subscription, but a trauma to work through. This too shall pass.
13 Likes
Yeah, I hope so. It sucks feeling that way, because it makes it that much harder to connect with someone.
9 Likes
One of my favorites is still Low covering the song Africa.
What a great series, though!
5 Likes
Knock me down
I get right back up again
Come back stronger than a powered up Pacman
-Kaiser Chiefs, ‘Oh My God’
6 Likes
I have pneumonia.
Right in the midst of the busy time at work. And this cough? Ugh.
I’m on mess, but they’re taking their sweet time doing anything, let me tell you.
Fuck this.
15 Likes
I was a huge reader as a kid. I was lost in a world of fantasy and very lonely. Around the time of 6th grade I started looking up out of the books. Even though I am a good reader and continued to read through high school, I pride myself on not being like I was as a kid, drowning away all emotion by focusing on the characters.
My favorite books were the Trumpet of the Swan by E.B. White and a Roauld Dahl book called Danny Champion of the World. I reread both these books to my daughter and oh my god the way they echoed the emotional themes of my childhood was so poignant. How writers do that I do not know.
I get what you mean about reading being sometimes an unhealthy emotional escape.
10 Likes
Trump is president elect, and in about 3 days will be sworn in as president.
18 Likes
My sweetie is out of town this week, which means on the days that I work (MWF), the dog is home by herself, which she isn’t used to (he works from home). When we first got her, she was pretty okay with being on her own for the day, but with each time he goes out of town, she gets more anxious. F’rinstance, on his last trip she demolished a pair of his shoes that were left in the living room.
Monday I decided to put her in her crate while I was at work, which worked out okay, but I felt really bad about it. So today I figured, I’ll give her the Gorilla toy filled with kibble & treats, and leave the radio on, and make sure there are no shoes lying about, and surely she’ll be fine.
NOPE. I came home to find three bottles of cooking oil (which had been on a low shelf) in the living room, destroyed. Huge puddle of oil on the floor. Huge puddle of oil on the futon. Plus of course it’s tracked everywhere (hooray for hard floors, at least). Oh. My. God. This is so not how I wanted to spend my evening 
27 Likes
I hope your dog handles cooklng oil for dinner better than mine or your morning may not be much fun either! 
16 Likes
