Gentleman arrested for smuggling cocaine inside fake penis

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/06/24/gentleman-arrested-for-smuggli.html

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Are you happy to see me or are you smuggling bolivian marching powder?

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TSA: Do you have any illegal narcotics on your person, sir? Cocaine, perhaps?

TRAVELER: (Feigning indignation) Blow? Me??

TSA: I’m going to need to need you to take off your underwear.

TRAVELER: Wait that’s not what I meant…

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Let he who has not smuggled cocaine inside a fake penis for personal use later cast the first stone. I would it expect it to be as common as running a yellow light. I mean, what else would you use your fake penis for, if not to smuggle cocaine? This whole case is a travesty.

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weird. I have never had any issues smuggling a real penis inside a fake penis before. :thinking:

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It does beg the question of how TSA deals with legit fake penii.

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I remember an old “News of the Weird” article on a man who injected cocaine into his penis and got a 48-hour priapasm, which resulted in gangrene and the required amputation of his little buddy.

So . . . goddamned right he put cocaine into a fake penis.

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Mentally trying to do the conversions to figure out if I should be impressed by the volume of cocaine he fit inside the fake penis…

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The cocaine is fake, the penis is real.

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Was there a tattoo of “Welcome to Jamaica, Have a nice day” involved?

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really curious how he worked the fake one into place with his real one in the way. then again, maybe it’s just as simple as tucking, i don’t know.

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Dammit, Bubba! Ya beat me to it!
So you know ‘Wendy’, too?!

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Ummm. Probably should have picked just one, pal.

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By any chance, is this gentleman a cousin of Dexter St. Jacques? (NSFW)

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What if I didn’t know it was a fake penis ?

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“They’ll never check the fake penis! . . .I can’t believe they found my fake cocaine-filled penis.”

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Why didn’t he suitcase it like a normal person?

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/suitcase

The cocaine or the penis?

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Customs Inspector: “I call fake. There’s only one Ron Jeremy… and you may get to meet him.”