GOP lawmaker driven mad by bill that would decriminalize children who take naked photos of themselves, delivers a frenzied rant about anal sex on legislature's floor

I’ve long wondered how Trump could have been conceived… but now

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He wasn’t born, he was. . . uhhh. . . dumped?

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"Please continue," the speaker said, offering Klippert the release he was seeking.

“Release The Klippert!!

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One can only hope that one of his colleagues had the compassion to pass him some tissues so he could clean himself up after giving the speech. That had to be so embarassing.

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I’m thinking someone should check this guy’s browser history…

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Something about anal? What?

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I think he was reading a list of Pornhub video clip headers.

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By the age of about 11/12 my young hormones were so totally carbonated I couldn’t see straight…so to speak. If there had been the tech availability kids have today I would have been totally screwed. Where all this insanity in my young mind came from I’m not sure. The one thing I do know that a good honest sexual education, explanation would have been a God save. The incredible value of have had a sane honest adult say to me " listen Kid, Sounds like you’re possibly gay " " Lets talk about what that might mean and don’t worry, you’re still a great kid." A handful of such words would have relieved so many years of fear, self loathing, and irresponsible sex. Yet no such adult existed and I carried the shame and horror of eternal damnation knowing that in the entire world there were likely only a scant number of other boys so twisted as my self. Perhaps those scars built character, perhaps the lack of those scars would have freed me to run full speed at developing my life instead of trying to hide from it and deny it. It was cowardly wretches like Klippert that kept that information away from a kid who needed answers not condemnation about my curious development. Yet I was the pervert. Maybe somebody needs to smack this MOFO right in the face.

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That’s the band name sorted.

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I once read Green Eggs and Ham doing Sam-I-Am in a weird drone and doing the unnamed character in a normal voice.

And then in the end when he tried them and liked them I gradually morphed my voice from normal to the same drone.

I think my daughter was too young to notice what I was doing.

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He seems quite practiced at reading that list with one hand.

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Sounds like his horror of underage kids exchanging dick pics (or boob pics, as the case may be) spurred him to literally read a list of anything that Washington State defines as “sexually explicit content”, which has nothing at all to do with this bill, but definitely plays an active role in Mr Klippert’s foremost fantasies.

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Yeah, kids probably shouldn’t be engaging in sex, and if they do, shouldn’t be filming it/taking pics. But it also shouldn’t be a crime.

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Yeah, the list of things that kids should be arrested for doing is a very small subset of the list of things kids shouldn’t do. (Or it ought to be)

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Exactly. The idea of someone being registered for the rest of their life as a sex offender and punished as if they are an actual child abuser because they sent a friend their age a dick pic when they were 14 is utterly insane, and I’m glad Washington is fixing the issue.

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If it weren’t for anal sex he would never have been born.

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This, I think, is the point of the law. Sending nude pics of yourself to your SO is often not a wise move, but I think it is not something that indicates a predilection for preying on kids, nor should subject one to the fate of those on the sex criminals list. That is a life long penalty for the equivalent of spray painting on a wall.

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Not even. I mean, 16-year-olds sharing sexy pictures is ill-advised for a few reasons, but it isn’t even wrongdoing. It’s just a bad idea, and it would be good if adults tried to educate kids about why it’s a bad idea. Making it illegal is just… I’d make an analogy but this guy probably also thinks that putting kids in prison for smoking weed is a good idea.

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