Grimly funny column from Fake Mitch McConnell


Originally published at:



Well put. He is one of the most dangerous rightwingers in operation. He quietly guts all we should stand for and because he looks like sucha doofus not enough people pay attention to the harm he does.


@beschizza that has to be your most repulsive illustration yet.
But it is Mitch McConnell after-all.


It’s the voters who are making the Faustian bargain—help the rich rob the poor on the chance that they’ll use some of that money to offer you a job.

The part of the bill that’s truly diabolical, though, isn’t the Medicaid cut as much as the fact that it gives preference to the red states—the states whose senators are calling for those cuts—in how the remaining funds are distributed. Apparently, the more “fiscally conservative” states will spend it better, and that entitles them to siphon additional tax dollars from states like New York to fund the same social program they say they want to dismantle.


Au contraire.


every time Mitch McConnell smiles it equals a minimum of 1000 human deaths


But you should see the portrait he’s got locked away:


That doesn’t disturb me.

Thomas the Tank Engine has much more humanity than whatever Mitch McConnell is.


I can’t believe I didn’t even realize those eyes were his mouth!


The concept is great, but I don’t think they really had enough material to stretch out even this short article, and they didn’t even attempt to write in the voice of McConnell.

The Onion used to have side panels with headlines that they didn’t actually write stories for. Basically one-liners that didn’t bear extrapolation. I’d put this there.

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