I have so many questions about this new video game where you play as Jesus

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/12/09/i-have-so-many-questions-about.html

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It’s probably fake.

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Tim curry called, he’d like his Lord of Darkness costume back.

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“JESUS CHRIST, WINS! FLAWLESS VICTORY!”

I have one question, “Why is Jesus white?”

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Because he WAS white, silly! That’s also why he couldnt have been a refugee!

/s

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I can’t wait to ask for this for winter solstice.

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As long as I can drive the demons out of innocent people into innocent hogs so I can drown the innocent hogs thus releasing the demons. Truly J-Man’s finest moment!

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Huh. A game that starts in God Mode.

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The 72-hour respawn timer is going to be a real downer on this one. I wonder if there’s a tithe-2-win mechanic that lets you skip the cooldowns?

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So long as it isn’t 30-50 hogs running through your back yard it’ll be okay.

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I really, really hope there’s a Harrowing of Hell sequence where you have 72 hours to break into Hell, take control, and judge everyone, or you can’t Ascend.

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The comments on the announcement trailer are amazing.

02 AM 40 AM

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The OG re-spawn…

I’ll stick with the copy if Bible Blaster that Rod and Todd gave me…

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Priest Simulator does seem like a lot of fun TBH

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You think making a Jesus simulator in a first person shooter engine is crazy?

This Jesus simulator in a wresting game engine has been out for years.

(Played by youtube’s best LPer, supergreatfriend)

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This should spur some new game classifications. First Person Savior? Robe-like? Realtime Role Praying Game?

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The final boss fight in this game isn’t as good as the one against Mecha-Caesar in “Christ: Race to the Manger”.

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“Fight with Satan in the desert”? What gamer could resist the appeal of White Jesus’s daddy intoning “finish him!” at the end, as before you execute his signature combat move of tearing off Satan’s head and entrails before tossing it at him.

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If the religious right has any influence, there could be in game purchases to buy forgiveness in the event that you are tempted by the sins of the flesh.

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Religious dogma would suggest that would be a bad end I think. The storyline is usually that Jesus has to die and Satan has to live for the world to be good. The details of how exactly this works escapes me for the moment.

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