Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/12/09/i-saw-mommy-kissing-yog-soth.html
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“I’m Dreaming of a Colour Out of Space Christmas”.
Although, I guess that, “I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas” would fit well with H.P.'s weltanschauung.
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I work in logistics. We handle the freight between Amazon and the post office.
I see enough madness and horror at x-mas already.
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Soylent Night
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“Select Parcel Size: Small, Medium, Large, Cyclopean, Extra-Euclidean.”
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Is “Baby, It’s Cold, Dark and Cyclopean” on the list, or too controversial these days?
I love this. As others have pointed out, All Holidays Matter.
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Very well done! I especially like the old-timey radio sound. This is my kind of Christmas music!
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I notice that they didn’t touch the one, true song of cosmic horror, “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmastime.” It’s based on a piece by Erich Zann and after McCartney recorded it, his fingertips bled for a month.
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Those backwards voices saying “Paul is dead” were telling the truth.
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Wanton in a Wicca Wonderland.
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That was on in a store the other day. McCartney was just being a dick, right? Like one day MCartney wakes up and think, “Let’s see just how bad I can make something and still have them act like they love it.”
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Has to be.
I don’t think it’s possible to make something that awful by accident. It’s like a bottomless, yawning pit sucking in every happy feeling I’ve ever had.
I can’t even think of a song I hate more than “Wonderful Christmastime”. The 1-8-7-7-kars4kids jingle, Happy X-Mas (The War is Over) by John Lennon and the Plastic Ono Band (wtf John?), and Do They Know It’s Christmas? from the Band Aid record (screw you Bob and Midge) all come close, but Sir Paul gets the trophy.
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Is it that time of year again to gather the family around the pentagram?
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Is Wizard’s “I wish it could be Christmas every day” not a call for a permanent state of timeless evil all on its own?
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I will always love the original (subsequently changed) version of that song for the line: “Tonight thank God it’s them instead of you.” How can I hate a Christmas song that’s about what a fucking monster I am?
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Now that’s going to be stuck in my head all day… thanks…
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But just think, now you are armed with the ultimate rick-roll revenge song!
Fun story: the reason I know that songs exists is because a younger sibling of mine found the New Kids on the Block christmas album on cassette tape in our public library. They subsequently somehow convinced their teacher in one of their highschool classes to let them do a presentation on New Kids on the Block day (April 24, google it), and played that song for their class.
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I remember that line being a real “wait…what?” moment for me as a teenager.
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Someone in our high school Spanish class, I don’t remember exactly who it was ( 
), translated the parody “New Kids Got Run Over By a Reindeer” into Spanish and wrote it on the blackboard as a trollish prank. It was probably full of errors, but hey, it’s the thought that counts, right? 
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oOg, NKOTB.
I will repay this someday. When you least expect it? Expect it. And your little dog too.
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