In Arizona speech, Trump calls for 'ideological certification' of immigrants, mass deportation, and that wall

Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2016/08/31/in-arizona-speech-trump-calls.html

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In the speech, Trump called for “Ideological certification” of all would-be immigrants, and said we should only let people in who “love us.”

Because we can all reliably tell when somebody is lying.

Trump is lying.

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Those Make Mexico Great Again Too hats are gonna have major collector value in a few decades. At least, that’s what I’m telling myself as I stockpile them.

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It’s too bad Trump doesn’t have someone like Albert Speer who could give his hate rallies some real class.

Even Triumph does it better:

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I just read through his speech; it makes perfect sense if you don’t stop to think about what any of it means.

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If you aren’t vomit prone, read Trump’s alternate reality speech alongside annotations from the reality the rest of us inhabit, courtesy of the Washington Post

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I’d love to be a fly on the wall in his campaign office.

“Make Mexico Great Again Also”? That’s straight from a political satire.

I get that Trump… lives in a special place, so I can understand why he thinks that’s clever or cool. But Giuliani? Whatever you think of his policies he’s still a relatively intelligent and politically savvy person. Surely he could see how ridiculous the hats were when Trump handed him one.

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His on-stage hype men wore “Make Mexico Great Again Also” hats, which reports say Trump came up with himself

No kidding? All by himself? Well I’ll be.

Nope. Not a clue.
Infographic: The Screening Process for Refugee Entry into the United States | whitehouse.gov[quote=“xeni, post:1, topic:84535”]

Trump called for “Ideological certification” of all would-be immigrants, and said we should only let people in who “love us.”
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Heil, mein Führer!

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Surely by now he is just going through the motions until this burning runaway train finally derails and he can jump to safety?

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“Angel Moms”? Wasn’t that proved to be propaganda to help people through the dark days of 1914?

I’m not certain I’m ready to commit to “loving” America. I mean, there’s a lot of you, and some of you smell funny or play rough.

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Truly, he is the Zapp Brannigan of our age.

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Donald Trump is like a DDOS attack on fact-checkers.

Brilliant!

I never thought until now what would actually happen if we tried to implement these policies.

First we would assemble a huge, poorly-trained parapolice force. Because that’s working out great over at DHS. We would task them with finding all the illegal immigrants but inevitably many legal immigrants and US citizens would be swept up in the dragnet.

At first they would be hustled to the Sonora desert and dumped by the thousands. Packed into semis like cattle, many would perish along the way, especially small children and the elderly.

Very quickly the courts would put a stop to this, at which point thousands of Latinos would be packed into detention centers, hastily erected in the desert. Food and water? We hadn’t planned on that, and it gets expensive fast. Again, many of the weak die in custody. Only a fraction can be processed by the courts; most languish in custody.

A guard force is hastily assembled, with less training and oversight than commercial prisons. Every sadist in America applies for the job. Some are hired, and the overcrowded detention centers become truly nightmarish. Homeland Security is tasked with clamping down on the press, but horror stories continue to leak out daily.

After only a few weeks, the courts would halt the whole process, but sorting out the mess would take years. Thousands are carried home in a newly-assembled fleet of buses, but hundreds of thousands will take to the roads on foot. By the time they reach Tucson they’re really hungry.

Again, the cases would overwhelm the courts as thousands of US citizens and immigrants demand justice. As the entire system collapses, illegal immigration returns to pre-Trump levels, but that fact is suppressed in the media. The press is forbidden to report lots of things. but it’s hard to stop the internet. There’s probably a new Great Wall of Censorship, but every kid in America knows how to bypass it and again the courts strike it down after millions have been spent and the vendors have new mansions in Big Sur.

Did I miss anything? The Republican Party would be effectively disbanded, but their place taken by a new Conservative Party. Every member insists they had nothing to do with the Arizona Disaster. Nobody will ever be tried for the thousands of human rights violations. We’ll pretend it never happened.

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Sadly, I don’t see much here that wouldn’t\couldn’t happen

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Hey, with access to large Arizona “work camps”, Nike could put, “Made in America” on their products.

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Trump showed me how to buy a wall with No Money Down! And get free government money!

His seminars on the real estate secrets the government doesn’t want you to know about made me $2billion in the first month.

Step right up…

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There are so many of us that Trump doesn’t seem to love at all. Will he deport himself?

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It’d be funny if his poll numbers wouldn’t keep rising. The more offensive and horrible and racist he becomes, the more people say they’ll absolutely vote for him.

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Maybe the “Trump” button on voting machines could be linked to trapdoors leading to piranha pools? This would be costly, but could be worth the effort, as there is finally a clear test for, “Unfit to Vote”

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Ideological certification. Holy fuck…

Really? Wow.

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