Came here to make a joke about the 2 train and then I noticed the image accompanying the article. Well played.
Maybe the MTA should install buckets with toilet lids underneath beneath the seats for emergencies. Just flip the regular seat up, sit back down, and release. When finished, alert the conductor, who will notify a station ahead to have a sanitation worker come and trade out the cylinder. 
Tack a small scheisswagen on the end of the train, a rolling porta-potty, maybe a 4-seater. Pump-out when needed.
I remember a news story about a guy who got stuck in an elevator over the weekend. He could pry open the doors and thereby have (limited) access to the elevator shaft, and thereby peed out of the car.
Just be careful not to pee on John McClane.
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