Jeb Bush confirms he would kill baby Hitler

I demand Globnar!

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Relax guys, everyone kills Hitler on their first trip.

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Why does it always have to involve killing Hitler? Couldn’t you go back and move next door to his family, act as a friend, and try and influence him to be more tolerant and loving? Maybe even tell him you’re Jewish once you’ve gained his trust.

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That sounds like a lot of work

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Probably less work than spending the rest of your life in prison for infanticide and being treated like a dangerous and deluded pariah.

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Thank you! This thread had gone on far too long without this gem surfacing (yet again, like a time traveling U-boat from the… oh wait).

I hope they ask ÂĄYeb! and the other GOP master debaters if they would kill fetus Hitler.

And as to killing Hitler vs making him a nicer person, can we get him to use a condom so he doesn’t get syphilis and perhaps didn’t go (quite so) bonkers? Of course we want to shoot the son of a b!tch, we’re Merrrikah! My son wanted to try to make homemade rice crisps and rice cakes. Tough to do without frying. The breakfast cereal is made with heat and high pressure, suddenly released PUFF! It didn’t take off until they marketed it as Rice Krispies the breakfast cereal shot out of guns! pew pew!

[quote=“wrecksdart, post:20, topic:69004”]Our news cycles, HFS. If anything, we should send Carson back–he’d stab the shit out of those pyramids everyone![/quote]Spoiler: The reason Carson keeps talking about things that never happened is because he’s from the universe with no baby Hitler.

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You could encourage him to keep applying to art schools, keep his hopes up, and simply not allow him to become one of the most notorious mass murderers in history.

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Even if killing baby Hitler does make things better, where does that lead? I figured this SMBC comic needed to be mentioned here, since it is from just this last Friday, so might have been some kind of warning from the future.

But then maybe that’s not such a coincidence, since SMBC does seem to bring this up an awful lot.

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Killing Georges Clemenceau may have been a better move for that. It wouldn’t have got the US out of the war, but Hitler would have been leader of a small party of little significance because the war reparations would not have been as bad for Germany.

“I think I did as well as might be expected, seated as I was between Jesus Christ [Wilson] and Napoleon Bonaparte [Clemenceau].”
- David Lloyd George

If you stopped Wilson from becoming a politician instead, he may have moved to Carlisle, UK. His mother was born there, he went on holiday there and he made a point of visiting when he was in the UK at the end of the war.

Tangentally connected. there is a pub called the Woodrow Wilson in Carlisle, but it is a Wetherspoons and not in one of the Harry Redfern designed New Model Inns so it’s not that interesting.

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@RubenBolling seems to like this theme…

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first, such a hypothetical question is a trap and a sucker bet that should be flatly rejected. second, being a sucker like jeb!, as well as a halfwit, means you do exactly what his halfwit brother did–shoot first ask questions later. that is you commit to action without considering any or all of the consequences.

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I would given Gavrilo Princip a sandwich so he wouldn’t have gone into the sandwich shop.

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Or he could have told Oskar Kokoschka not to apply for that Austrian art academy.

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Umm, point of order @manybellsdown, please move this to the relaxation thread…

(sorry, couldn’t help myself–that link is gold!)

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Say what you will about Hitler, but consider this: he did kill Hitler.

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That Lloyd George quote is awesomely spot on.

We all know where this leads…

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Is this thread unGodwinnable?

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I think you have to invoke Napoleon.

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