Jesus! Jesus and Santa Claus are verifiably white


according to Fox News host Megyn Kelly.

I hate to pick this up from the Daily Fail, but recently started checking that silly site after all the BB furore around it.


Santa is magic, he can be whatever he wants. But he’s better off being white at the north pole at least. Getting enough vitamin D has got to be tough up there. Santa needs to get his slaves elves to build him a sun lamp.


I bet that scheming Megyn Whatsherface had the half-empty glass of milk DNA tested just to get the evidence she needed to say that Santa is verifiably white. What a cynical ploy.


Being imaginary has its advantages. I pick a lime green Santa with a fuchsia suit and a cerulean beard. The talking heads can’t stop me, no matter how gaudy the color scheme. They are my crayons after all.




She didn’t weigh in on the ethnicity of The Tooth Fairy too?


I have a real set of crayons right here in my desk drawer, and an imaginary set of crayons, but it has many more colors :slight_smile:


Sorry, misdirected reply:
I have a real set of crayons right here in my desk drawer, and an imaginary set of crayons, but it has many more colors :slight_smile:


Her dentist told her the Tooth Fairy didn’t exist, so she doesn’t believe in it, and won’t talk about it.


“But I was the office’s Secret Santa and I’m BLACK!!”

“No you’re not! Not even Secret Santa!!!” -Megyn Kelly


I can’t wait for someone to build a time machine just so I can see the looks on neocons’ faces when they find out that Jesus looked more like Osama Bin Laden than Brad Pitt.


For all we know he might have looked like Woody Allen sans glasses.


Can we have a Gene Wilder Jesus? Because that would be so awesome.


If I could like this comment a million times, I would.


That “Godspell” version was reasonably close.


You’d need to go far, far, far into the future for that brainwave to stabilise.


To be fair, she probably just didn’t feel like looking up Dwayne Johnson’s family tree.

… I’m embarrased that I even know that that movie exists.


Ashkenazis are a lot more European in admixture than first century Jews born in Bethlehem.


As the old joke has it, “God wasn’t at all what I expected. First of all, she’s black…”

Santa Claus, given the specific origin of that myth, would be easier to defend as a nordic type.


I quite fancy the idea of a United Nations type panel of Santas rotating annually. I’ve always been confused - is he a saint? Is he a Spanish saint? Why is he a Spanish saint with a German name?

My kids love him. That’s all that matters to me. I might wonder aloud where he’s from and what he looks like.