John Bolton vows not to shave moustache

Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2016/12/23/john-bolton-vows-not-to-shave.html

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Good for him!

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HA HA HA!!! Do you appreciate that Trump is totally biased against facial hair?

Now, I will admit that maybe Trump isn’t really biased against facial hair, but from past statement the guy is clearly concerned with looks, and from his current staff picks he doesn’t consider intelligence or experience as deciding factors.

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Actually the moustache reached too-big-to-shave status in late 2006.

But according to rumor, the real reason Trump doesn’t like Bolton is his unusually large fingers.

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ASSTHETIC

A very principled stand from Bolton. If only his principles on foreign policy weren’t so awful.

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I appreciate the grooming advice from the totally unbiased mainstream media

Way to shoot the messenger.

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What is this nonsense? I clicked over to the article and find that John Bolton possesses merely one (admittedly luxuriant) moustache.

Where are the eyestaches, earstaches and nostrilstaches?!?!?

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Damn. Given Trump’s obvious preference for white males, a cabinet full of Wilford Brimleys was my last hope.

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He can always go back to being Mr Pastry.

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Nut case or not, 'stache shaming is not ok.

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We thought we were getting Caligula but it turned out we’re getting Elagabalus.

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That’s the first thing I thought of, too!

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Because a comb over cheeto just screams “presidential”!

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That would be awesome!

"The Augustan History claims that he also married a man named Zoticus, an athlete from Smyrna, in a public ceremony at Rome.[51] Cassius Dio reported that Elagabalus would paint his eyes, epilate his hair and wear wigs before prostituting himself in taverns, brothels,[52] and even in the imperial palace:

Finally, he set aside a room in the palace and there committed his indecencies, always standing nude at the door of the room, as the harlots do, and shaking the curtain which hung from gold rings, while in a soft and melting voice he solicited the passers-by. There were, of course, men who had been specially instructed to play their part. For, as in other matters, so in this business, too, he had numerous agents who sought out those who could best please him by their foulness. He would collect money from his patrons and give himself airs over his gains; he would also dispute with his associates in this shameful occupation, claiming that he had more lovers than they and took in more money."
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stay strong, mister bolton!

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It’s not the "stache per se. It’s that Trump feels intimidated by Bolton’s “Free Mustache Rides” t shirt.

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Everybody has this wrong. Headline should read “Moustache refuses to have Bolton shaved off.”

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From the Casting Couch:

Bolton: "But, why should I have to shave my 'stache?"
Trump: “Because it tickles when we kiss”

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I do have kinder feelings toward the mustache than I do toward the man. It’s one hellavua 'stache.

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