Man busted for painting squirrels red

Your neighbor is an eejit. Those things fucking hurt. I’ve been on the receiving end of a few.

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Sometimes I like to Tee them up. Thank you for giving it a good smack.

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Another new euphemism for some sort of very fringe activity not mentioned in polite society (or not even known of in polite society).

ETA @snigs - I may owe you a sip or three of Coke.

@sqlrob I’d love to know where the hell that usage originated from. It’s bonkers. Ducks in a row makes some sort of sense, at least (if squinted at from an angle)

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Nah, you just have to give them their own place that’s better than your place.

This is just one of two houses, they’ve been home to multiple baby squirrels that are a joy to see scurrying about when they’re babies.

This house is less than 15 feet outside my house, they’ve never even tried to get into my attic.

There’s room for all of us.

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The rationale given in this story makes sense. It’s to know if something is coming back, identifying the problem.

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The department interviewed Kuhn over the weekend and charged him with three counts of poisoning or attempting to poison animals, a misdemeanor under New York State Agriculture and Markets Law.

So NY thinks rat poison is ok but squirrel poison isn’t?

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One of my partners recently moved into a new apartment. For their housewarming gift from me (aside from coming over and assembling a lot of IKEA furniture), I gave them a set of “Lizard wall hooks” like this one:

image

Circumstances conspired such that we couldn’t see each other for a few weeks. I said that I was disappointed because I wanted to be there to help them with all those tasks that you have when you’ve just moved into a place. They assured me that while they did have help from another partner with some things, there was still furniture for me to assemble and I could “hang my lizards.”

I’m not sure for what, but that definitely sounded like an euphemism to me!

… and maybe we’ll do in a squirrel or two
while we’re poisoning pigeons in the park.

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When I was growing up, my parents found evidence of mice in the house. No good! Out came the Havahart trap. Got a mouse almost immediately. We had a decent bit of land, 1.5 acres or so and far longer than it was wide. So she took it way out to the back of our property and released it.

Repeat the next day, and the next. The next week and the next. A couple of dozen trappings later, it didn’t make sense. They’d found like one dropping in a drawer, we obviously weren’t infested…

So the next time the trap was sprung, mom grabbed a green felt marker. Field mice have a white belly, so she stuck the pen up through the bars of the cage and gave it a little green dot in the middle of its white fur.

You see where this is going! Every time the trap was sprung, it was the same mouse, green dot on its belly, finding its way back from the edge of the yard. My parents did a search of the foundation, spotted the little gap it was using, and sealed it up. And that, finally, was the end of that.

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The ̶C̶a̶t̶ Rat Came Back

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This is why when we sentenced a mouse to transportation we make it a significant distance. One winter we had several get inside, enough that the cats actually grew bored with hunting them and would often ignore them even when they were hanging out in plain sight on the hearth of our fireplace! (“Yeah, I see it. Look, I’m napping; I’ll get it later.”)

So I put on a pair of gloves and caught the mouse myself – just grabbed it right off the bricks before it could move. I knew not to just toss it out in the yard and I didn’t have the heart to kill it by hand, so we popped it into a box and took it for a drive.

We released it about six miles direct distance from our house in a field along the road about 200 yards away from Tim and Tom’s Cheese Shop. We encouraged it as it scampered into the weeds, “Go live that dream little mouse. More cheese and crackers than a hundred mice could eat in a lifetime.” I seriously doubt it made it, but at least it had the possibility.

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