Do you feel the same way when there’s a human-interest piece about a gay or interracial marriage couple?
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“Hey Sierra, remember when Cristina and I got married and you were in 4th grade?”
Note the source youtube channel - “Barcroft TV”, in their series “Extreme Love”.
It basically is a collection of interviews / short documentaries, about unusual ways in which people live their love. A reality show, you might call it.
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Well…seeing as I am an interracial marriage couple of 22 years now and never went on the news to report on it…yeah…I do.
I do honestly feel when people purposefully choose to put a spotlight on themselves its for vanity reasons. And I am not judging them for their relationship choices…If they are happy and everyone is mentally and emotionally healthier for it…have it it. It just isn’t news worthy to me.
also @dragonfrog I would compare what they are doing there perhaps to NPR’s StoryCorps? http://www.npr.org/podcasts/510200/storycorps
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Yes, we do know why: the producers of “Barcroft TV” asked them if they could do a segment on the family, and they said “Sure.” Similar to the “Couple Who Spent $60,000 on Disney Dolls,” also on their site. It always strikes me as funny when people assume the subjects of fluff video/TV profiles are always craving attention, as opposed to being the (sometimes reluctant) subject matter of journalists and video producers desperate to fill the web’s bottomless content hole.
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Yep, they probably will get some heat. Like the only kid with a one-parent family does. Or the kids whose dad left and hooked up with a same-sex partner. And the one whose mother is persistently REALLY late to pick her up from events. And the kid whose clothes are out of fashion because poor.
Kids have to weather all kinds of shit from their peers, who oftentimes are themselves simply trying to lay a reassuring, normalizing cloak over All The Things in a crazy and unpredictable world.
Tools, tools, tools. If these three are half as thoughtful and caring as they seem, the kids will be, as they say, alright.
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But if someone doing a series of interview / documentary videos on loving families who have interesting or unusual situations, were to approach you requesting an interview, would you have refused to be interviewed?
Would you have harshly judged another interracial couple who accepted the request, perhaps because they saw an opportunity to normalize interracial marriage in a place & time where it was still looked down upon?
EDIT: Thanks for the link to the storycorps series, that looks really interesting!
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Good for them. I can’t ever imagine navigating this sort of arrangement–seems very complicated. But if they make it work, more power to them.
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Yet, they could have said no.
to @dragonfrog Honestly…probably would say no, yes. My spouse and I have found ourselves as an interracial couple getting unwanted attention all too often. So being fairly private as we are, we’d probably decline. There could be a situation where we might accept the offer true enough, but generally speaking we’d say no.
also…you’re welcome. It is a good series. I also recommend this podcast which focuses specifically on relationships: https://soundcloud.com/hopefully-we-dont-breakup
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They will have to deal with bigots, yes, and that’s a shame. But bigotry needs to be fought.
“I worry about the kids” is often used as a soft sort of victim-blaming, to cast aspersions on an unusual marriage arrangement under the guise of well-meaning concern. If that’s not what you meant, though, then I’m glad to hear it.
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Hey, honey, it’s thursday- let’s get a babysitter and cruise the mall for reptile vendors.
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My friends were able to effectively have a three way marriage, but I’m convinced that it’s only because one of them works in a law office and they’ve been willing to put years and a small fortune into filing all the correct paperwork. They’ve been together some twenty-some-odd years at this point.
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How do you think gay marriage went from despised to generally accepted in such a comparatively short period of time? Because brave people spoke up and demonstrated that their relationships were not mysterious or depraved, but normal and healthy. Social change cannot happen in darkness.
And why do you keep insisting that this is some sort of vanity project? This is, apparently, a show about unusual relationships. If someone approached these people asking to tell their story, who are you to say that should have kept it hidden?
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My standard-issue marriage was announced in the press, as many are (pick up your local newspaper)
Do you have a problem with my marriage?
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Is that Dave Grohl on the bottom?
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it’s pronounced “koonts”
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Is that Matt Damon? (I kid I kid)
In all seriousness, good for them. While I don’t believe in polyamory, if that works for someone else, well more power to them (except for bigamy because that involves an explicit breach of trust). I’ve known a few polygamist familes in my life and somehow they make it work and be happy.
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Then be glad, because there’s no “if” about it.
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In other words, if they simply straighten up and fly right, and hide their arrangement like it’s something to be ashamed of, they will save themselves from the bullying and harassment that we are piling upon them. Glad we cleared that up.
Didn’t anyone here grow up in the 70s? Polyamorous arrangements and open marriages were certainly a thing then, and certainly talked about.
Unfortunately, we have short memories, hidden agendas, and the ghost of Ronald Reagan.
[channeling popo]
Hmm. I’m actually in favor of this. The couple should get divorced so they could ultimately all have equal status in the relationship.
[/channeling popo]
But yeah, not only is the headline not correct, it sounds like an unfunny joke from the 60s.
Ahahaha nope. Half of all marriages end in divorce. The ones that don’t have all kinds of hinky shit going on behind the scenes. Stable 2-parent relationships are not only seriously in the minority, but also are an idealization.
I don’t think there would be such a story. Maybe if this were the 90s or the 70s, respectively.
This is obviously a teaser for a reality TV show, and there wouldn’t be a reality show without looky-loos. I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, it could change people’s minds. On the other hand, the whole concept of reality TV just seems exploitative to me, like for every person they reach there are ten of the unwashed masses pointing and laughing.
Even reading through the bbs comments, this is still an issue for some people. For me, I just don’t care. I’m far from shocked, and I’m happy for them actually.
Oh please. Guys marry trophy wives all the time, but somehow the age difference is weird in this case?
What, so now her occupation is the weird part? Or was it that they met their girlfriend the same way a lot of us meet our romantic partners? Y’know, just by getting out in the fresh air and meeting people while doing stuff? Of course, if it were an internet thing, you’d probably have choice words to say about that as well.
It’s amazing how we find these little tiny nits to pick because we don’t have balls or ovaries enough to say that polyamory weirds us out. It’s okay if it weirds you out. You don’t have to be comfortable with every one of every rando’s life choices. But you* don’t have to be a judgmental asshole either.
As for me, I’m old, nothing surprises me anymore assuming it ever did, and I don’t give a fuck what they do. I just hope they’re happy.
*generic you, not you personally
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