Men upset by cartoon


#21

Jesus Christ. This is some sort of Rorschach test if you can take the bland humor of the New Yorker and find away to get offended by it.


#22

Seems like the Fry quote could potentially be used against both sides (of many issues).


#23

why go to a museum together … Maybe they just met.

why talk to someone in a museum


#24

Museums are pick-up joints for intellectuals.


#25

oh, hang on, it’s the New Yorker? - then shouldn’t the caption just be “Christ, what an asshole!” ?


#26

Here’s an artistic response to those commenters:

[quote=“ChuckV, post:4, topic:96005, full:true”]
Hmmm, must say that if someone said to me “I wonder what it means” and if I felt I had any insight, I might say a little about it.[/quote]

I understand the feeling, but I’ve learned over the years that a response like “Me, too. What do you think it means?” is usually a much more productive response in those situations than launching into my own thoughts. That’s even truer when I’m out with a woman.


#27

pick-up joints for intellectuals

intellectuals who don’t want to discuss the art?


#28

The painting in the picture is clearly a piece of abstract art, though.


#29

Looks more like the Artist’s intent was pulling a Lennon and going ‘Try figuring this shit out.’


#30

especially those who would equate their behavior towards you with your opinion of them.

But those folks will use whatever is on hand to give you a ‘being hit on the head lesson’.


#31

The cartoon seems rather purposeful in being ambiguous, which i find a tad manipulative. It can be interpreted as either person being the one in the wrong. The lady for being offended over being offered an opinion, and the guy for “mansplaining”. Maybe it’s both.

Were i in a similar situation like this in real life and someone wondered out loud what a painting meant i would definitely take that as an open discussion. Regardless if i knew something about it or not, and if the other person called me out on mansplaining i would seriously reconsider why we were even spending the day at a museum.


#32

I wonder if the point isn’t that men tend to convey things in an authoritative way, rather than engaging in dialog. If the response is “it means x” then that’s “mansplaining.” But if the response is “I wonder if it means x” then that’s the beginning of a dialog.

I admit I get riled when people call me out for mansplaining (there’s a particular commenter here who I have only barely forgiven for her use of the word) because I think it can be misused to describe everything that comes out of a man’s mouth, rather than describing the particular behavior of dialog-ending, authoritative judgment.


#33

Of course you discuss the art. You can talk in a low pressure environment, sound the other person out, take it further by retiring to the coffee shop to chat over dessert, or politely retreat.


#34

I like all the assumptions people make about this image, especially the presumption they came together. That’s not indicated anywhere, that’s you coming up with a scenario where this is OK.

Equally as likely, just some woman looking at a painting, mumbling to herself, “huh, I wonder what it means” and some dude just telling her what he thinks.


#35

You can discuss art, but you can’t explain it for someone else. Especially if it’s an abstract piece where meanings are often personal. So you could say “It looks to me like …”, but you couldn’t say “It means …”


#36

#37


#38

I used to “wonder” things aloud in the company of my partner, until I understood that he was interpereting my absent musings as an actual request for an explanation. So I stopped doing it.

I can’t speak for your wife, but it seems to me that the miscommunication was not that you were offering your expert knowledge, it was that she was expressing frustration, not asking for an explanation. In that moment, she didn’t really care why the app sucked, but it was irritating her. Receiving what probably felt like a lecture on why the app might be frustrating her probably felt patronizing and unhelpful. If you were you were describing a bad experience with an unpleasant medical procedure to a female doctor, her explanation of the usefulness and need for the procedure might feel like scolding to some, while affirming the reality of your bad experience and discomfort might make you feel more at ease.


#39

I begin with the principle that all men are bores. Surely no one will prove himself so great a bore as to contradict me in this. -Soren Kierkegaard


#40

Yeah, but when you do it when you’re alone, it really helps you maintain your personal space.