Merry Christmas, someone stole Jesus's foreskin

“… there are even richer treasuries. Some time ago, in a German cathedral, I saw the skull of John the Baptist at the age of twelve.”
“Really?” I exclaimed, amazed. Then, seized by doubt, I added, “But the Baptist was executed at a more advanced age!”
“The other skull must be in another treasury,” William said, with a grave face.
[“The Name of the Rose”, Umberto Eco]

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Eco knew his history. Medieval commentators were well aware that there were fraudulent relics in circulation, but of course it was always the other cathedral’s one… The comment about building an Ark out of alleged fragments of the true cross was a medieval one.

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Not loaves, bris-cuits.

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Well, at least it gets you out in the open air.

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its so crazy, but i heard that about roman toiletry a few times (once when i was actually at the roman ruined city ostia antica where you can actually still see those old stone toilets) and now that you say it, it totally makes sense. while i suppose its possible some soldiers would try to ease the agony of a person being crucified, it seems more likely they’d be doing the opposite. i mean just judging from how our supposedly civilized modern soldiers and civilian guards treat prisoners. but I’m no religious scholar.

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You’re saying Jesus gives you wood? You’re not the first, of course.

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RLZORLs

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Some people dispute that Jesus was born at Christmas, but say it was adopted to take over the cred of pagan feasts like Saturnalia.

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Always look on the bright side.

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“I can see my house from here!”

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When my son was little he looked at the nativity scene, and was puzzled about why there were lambs depicted there, since he knew lambs are born in the spring.

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I seemed to recall there was also a theory called Miraculous Multiplication or something like that – basically, for the benefit of the faithful, certain relics could replicate themselves, with each instance still being genuine – but I’m damned if I can find a reference online.

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Little know fact: the above was the spiritual forebear of the Big Bang theory.

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