Mueller Report: EXCLUSIVE early copy of Bill Barr's redacted version, in full

Really, I was hoping you’d leave in the following unredacted words:

Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

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That part where

Unbelievable!

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Because if we don’t laugh, we’d be in a ball on the floor crying instead?

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YES! This!

[Sent from my iPhone while in a ball on the floor crying. ]

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Me, everyday, livin’ in the stupid timeline… I mean, with much less of a cool Scottish accent…

broadchurch-sad|nullxnull
(crying in Scottish…)

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I think I’m stuck in a permanent anxiety attack. For like a month. Feels like a truck is parked on my chest. My stomach aches like I haven’t eaten. There is a jet roaring in my head. My spirit animal is now a kicked dog. Sense of foreboding is strong.

Sitting here at work now on a web conference listening to how our insurance will be worse than last year. Someones phone in the call has stared playing hold music so the presenter is yelling over the muzak since he can’t figure out how to mute the person. Good times.

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I’m sorry…

kitty-hugs

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It’s ok. The ambitions are: keep breathing. Has to get better eventually.

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Yep… That’s true.

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For comparison, a page from the real report.

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Is this your first time?
I’ve seen Presidents impeached before.
Doesn’t seem to slow their agenda.

That’s basically the sub-plot from Twilight at Mac’s Place by Ross Thomas.

…and so on.

I don’t have any incentive to read this stuff, or to search it. But I appreciate that some people teach me how to deal with terrible PDFs.

That said, fuck everyone who ever publishes PDF-only data, regardless of the contents.

Yes, I am talking to you. Pay attention. You will roast in a special hell, and your tortured souls will ask for deliverance, getting the devil’s answer that you can only be reach it under great efforts, by editing all the headers, footnotes, running titles, column breaks, notes on the margin, tables, graphics, and rotated pages of your life by hand and one by one.

And only if you finished that someone will tell you the esoteric characters your chakra was written in can’t be translated to unicode and thus you will need to be transferred to a parse in a deeper level of hell.

100% it should be OCRed.

But I actually hope enough people are reading it in context for sense, rather than keyword searching for “Russia” and “pee tape”. It’s not that long a read.

At least we don’t live in a time where you’d have to wait for it to be physically published as a book.

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