“Police say” has become a universal indicator that what follows is a joke.
I’m picturing a mashup between the “Mars Needs Women” remix of “Pump up the Volume” and Herbie Hancock’s “Watermelon Man”.
We need the assistance of the best botanist on Mars, stat!
Sorry, we could only get the worst botanist on Mars. But in a stroke of luck, he’s the best buggy driver on Mars and so will be over shortly.
The Director was not amused.
Is that GIF of Marvin in 3D? It appears to have the telltale cyan and red fringes. I usually have anaglyph glasses beside my monitor, but they’ve apparently walked off, so I can’t check.
if there is any justice in the world, (Ron Howard: There isn’t.) Kissinger’s obit will consist of two words:
Only the good, etc.
maybe they would actually glow like that in earth’s atmosphere. don’t beat yourself up.
“This article was published in error.”
Oh, come on. Do you know how many subscribers you could have gained if you just said:
“This article was published in error. We meant to state that there were fields of butternut squash which was odd since they are normally found on Venus.”
Meanwhile, Louie Gohmert (it had to be Texas) is asking about the National Forest Service’s plans to combat climate change by - [checks notes] - changing the orbit of the Earth or the Moon:
if we move the moon, can we then grow watermelon there as well?
Moon Melon™: out of this world!
As god is my witness, I thought kiwis could fly.