News from the year 2051: The history of sending Halloween candy down a PVC pipe

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Does that mean I’ve been doing it wrong?


I’m curious if I’m going to see trick-or-treaters this year. I really don’t expect to, as they never show up in my neighborhood in a usual year, much less a year when the state explicitly said, “don’t do it.” But 2020 being 2020, I’m expecting the completely unexpected.

But I’m so filled with anxiety about the election, I forgot it was Halloween entirely until the Ministry post earlier.

Our neighborhood and most around our town seem to have accidentally coordinated well. Only younger kids are trick or treating and we knew exactly how many kids to expect. There’s a mix of basket/bowl left on porches and everyone wears masks and I pass it through the door without coming too close. Consensus was to do those gift bag things. Pack them full of candy and seal them up, surface contamination isn’t really much of a concern at this point but a discrete, sanitizable package of candy seemed wise. Plus with the kids visiting so few houses there’s good call to give them a lot of candy.

We got exactly as many kids as planned. All of them under 10, all of them from the block.

That said we are in NY where things have not returned to living hell yet.

I voted and grocery shopped today, so I was out for a good while before it hit me. I didn’t remember it was Halloween until around noon, when I realized the young woman helping me at the fish market was dressed as a Disney princess. Wondered why, then looked around and realized the entire staff was dressed as different Disney characters.

The fish cutter was the monkey from Aladdin.


We got 6 this year. Down from about 12 last year.




I haven’t had halloween visitors in 4 or five years.

Everyone remembers that fateful Halloween when illiterate Boogaloo Bois and other Trumpsters confused “chute” with “shoot”.

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Spotted in neighborhood.


I CNC machined a pumpkin an hour ago, turned out great


I saw a whole bunch of buckets in driveways, some with baggies, some loose candy. I also saw baggies on “clothes lines”, tables, or even just on the grass. One house tied in my mind for laziest and smartest by just ripping open a bag of candy and scattering it loose over his driveway, making me wonder why I spent time filling baggies like a chump. Exactly 0 PVC chutes.


We had folks with tables at the ends of driveways for the most part.

I had cordoned off the end of the driveway with a big “X” in a circle and a chalked sign “Stand here” where the catapult was zeroed in on. Except for one kid who was scared to try to catch the bag, everyone (~20 people) really seemed to enjoy it.

What really surprised me was the couple of sets of parents who thought it was ok to have their preschooler/toddler try to catch an unknown cloth bag about 5" diam. of unknown weight/density (to them). Um, no. Maybe someone should catch it so I don’t knock your kid over with a projectile…

Gotta upload a movie of the thing.


I had considered a surgical tubing and funnel slingshot affair but ultimately there was very little activity in our neighborhood.

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No Halloween this year at all. No kids. No fires. No Oíche Shamhna.

Kids were gutted so we did our own party. I noticed a lot more decoration around this year so I guess everyone was trying to make it up to their kids too.

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That was actually my first thought as I already had the exercise band, and it would have been easier to construct, but I thought… “hmm… while high speed shots at kids’ noggins would be more fun, a gentle lob would probably be more neighborly…”.


What, no NRA-approved candy guns?


Yeah, I had teenagers and parents I knew in mind as targets.

Also, where our house is situated it often gets skipped as we are near a corner that people turn at to go deeper into the neighborhood. Since the corner would have been at the edge of the slingshot range I had considered targeting groups there.

I was thinking of plastic sandwich bags with candy taped into a rough ball shape and some sort of luminescent streamer as a tail.

Oh well, there’s always next year.

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no action back in this dead-end kind of area, but for some reason someone was setting off fireworks this year. Usually that only happens when the seahawks win

There were many awesome candy chutes in my neighborhood, but I’ve got a narrow front walk and fence opening that can act as a choke-point when multiple groups walk in from the sidewalk and a chute wouldn’t be able to go that far, so we used a laundry-line pulley system to send our candy from the porch out to the sidewalk.

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