No, stapling your ears won't help you lose weight

Originally published at: No, stapling your ears won't help you lose weight | Boing Boing

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I don’t know…staph infection’s probably going to do something to make you lose some weight :roll_eyes:

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“Dr Rusty Lockjaws’ Medicinal Staples; accept no substitute!” :grimacing:

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How is ear stapling different from piercing?

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Gullibility of the recipients?

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Or even different from your older brother bullying you by flicking your ear every time he has the opportunity?

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Well, if they did that every time you tried to eat, that might actually work

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Stapling your ears helping you lose weight is entirely dependent on how bad you are at operating a stapler, and what size/grade of stapler you use. Blood does have weight you know!

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Stapling your ears might not help but stapling your mouth shut could have an effect.

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and don’t get us started about taping your face - just don’t

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Use a potato to start your car!

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… it’s homunculi all the way down :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking: :thinking:

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Not kidding, this is a thing

I was about to say you can’t make this up, but apparently someone could, so…

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Hey, couldn’t hurt to try!

/s

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I had my ears stapled to decrease my levels of gullibility.

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I could see it working if you stapled you ears to a tree in the back yard, far from the refrigerator.

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Granted, people do tend to eat less while writhing around on the floor in pain….

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“No, no, I said restricting your intake of staple foods, which are high in carbohydrates, may help you lose weight.”

“Sorry, I can’t hear you. I have a staple in my ear.”

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Where can I find some body safe staples?
My piercings are exactly the right width apart for a staple, but I don’t want to leave a normal one in my ear

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