Now there are subscription boxes for witches


Originally published at:

Jezebel apologizes for hiring Cannibal Witch as writer-at-large

Always wondered if she really could wiggle her nose that way or if it was a special effect. Anybody know?


A little of both, apparently:

“You have to wriggle your upper lip, and then your nose.” […] the twitch was enhanced by a sound effect (courtesy a xylophone) and a special effect (the film was sped up “just a tad,” Pilato says).


What might be called the classical witch comes in two basic varieties, the complicated and the simple, or, to put it another way, the ones that have a room full of regalia and the ones that don’t. Magrat was by inclination one of the former sort. For example, take magical knives. She had a complete collection of magical knives, all with the appropriate coloured handles and complicated runes all over them.

It had taken many years under the tutelage of Granny Weatherwax for Magrat to learn that the common kitchen breadknife was better than the most ornate of magic knives. It could do all that the magical knife could do, plus you could also use it to cut bread.

– Terry Pratchett, Witches Abroad


Something like this should come in the very first box:


a curated assortment of healing crystals, incense, spell candles, magickal herbs, oils, pagan jewelry, altar tools, ruins, apparel, and other bewitching goodies

Such as?


healing crystals, incense, spell candles, magickal herbs, oils, pagan jewelry, altar tools, ruins, apparel, and

–wait, go back to that bit about “ruins”? They send you ruins? In the mail?


Subscription boxes with spells, herbs, crystals, personalized BOS’, dream journals and all other manner of witchy paraphernalia have long been available online.

A pagan friend of mine started a business selling them, and has done okay…



Then I think they might have cut back on the effects budget a tad by the time her daughter became a prominent character.


She could do it. I saw her do it on some talk show in the 80s.

It was a tallent she had since she was a child, the kind of thing you do to impress other kiddies.


Ironically I see the fact that he is still alive as incontrovertible evidence that voodoo dolls do not work!


I was going to mention Magrat. She’s got her feet under the table at the Lancre castle, don’t you know.



This briefly got my hopes up, but it must mean runes?

But I’d certainly enjoy receiving shipments of glyphs carved into vegetation-covered walls, thrown-down fluted marble column-drums with faint traces of paint, a healthy-sized shattered bas-relief to reassemble, a shattered visage with a frown, and a wrinkled lip, and a sneer of cold command, etc., etc.


First time I have heard feral cats called homeless cats. I am sure it won’t be the last.


It’s all fun and games until they start sending things you didn’t order…


I just want to subscribe to the Henge of the Month Club!



Is he? Do you really trust his doctors to tell the truth?

The real question is what kind of undead is he?


Nonsense. Spanky is actually a robot.