Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/07/01/723739.html
She was living her best life.
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Police said her excuse was half-baked, ordered her to pay for the cake, the whole cake and nothing but the cake, and informed her that if she returned, she would be cited for a breach of the piece.
Interviewed later by Texas 5 News, Officer Schokoladenkuchen said that he wasn’t sure what had prompted the attempted theft, but there was a general suspicion the woman had been pie-eyed.
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Texas has nothing on Western New York
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If only she hadn’t forgotten to bring her portal gun.
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As a Floridian I can only heave a sigh of relief that this wasn’t another Florida story.
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… and that’s terrible.
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The beauty of using “Wichita Walmart incident” in your search is that you’ll pick up both Wichita Falls TX and Wichita KN, thereby effectively doubling your crazy redneck hits.
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And really, who among us can say that she has not, at one time or another, tried to have her cake and eat it too?
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Officers ordered her to pay the full price but did not issue her a citation.
Darn. I really wanted to see the mug shot of someone who just ate half a cake.
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No pics of her gambol down the cake-walk?
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Texas is gaining on you!
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She could not have her cake and eat it too, despite a vigorous attempt being made.
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If this were Florida she would have eaten the whole thing and stuffed the packaging in a random shelf.
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Are we going to have women competing for living their best lives at wal-mart now? First it was the lady with the wine-filled pringle can on a mobility scooter, now this!
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Asked to comment, Ivanka Trump said, “Oh, let her eat it.”
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If it were florida, she’d have thrown a live alligator through the cop car’s window.
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" As Falls Wichita, So Falls Wichita Falls"
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When the word Texas catches my eye in a headline, my first thought is: FFS, what did we do now?
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From the security camera in the bakery department:
Let her eat cake, I say.
There’s a soundtrack too:
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Well this takes the cake…
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