Well now, let that be a lesson to all venture capitalists. Just because it has an app, or because it’s got a crowdfunding campaign, or because it harvests data for sale, and just because it runs on a Gillette razorblade/ink cartridge DRM business model, doesn’t automatically mean it’s a viable business. Sometimes you can have all of those things and still end up with a juice-pulp squeezing robot. And sometimes you can find people out there with brilliant, world changing ideas that just need a little funding, and if you’d stop and listen for a moment instead of trying to pile on all the silly 21st century late-stage capitalism to maximize your profits before you’ve even started, you might end up ahead…
…snort…
AHAHAHAHAHA! What am I saying? People these days don’t learn things!
The reality is even better. The trickling down venture cash is mostly raised from pension funds, university endowments, and other public sources. So, haha, the joke’s on us.
If you immediately think, like me, ‘Wow, I could just buy some fruit and juice it, cheap and easy’ then you’re not the market.
This is for the person who will spend $800 on yoga pants if marketed right - those are the people the marketing failed. People who own your product need to be look down on the peasants who don’t have their product - that’s a huge part of what they’re buying.
And later in our program, we’ll be going over some clever mods to turn that old rent-seeking juice-packet machine into a deluxe new lube dispenser. Be sure to stick around!
I like to look on the bright side - there’s going to be some wildly over-engineered broken juicers hitting the market for real, real cheap, that have a bunch of pretty decent parts in them ready to be salvaged in other projects.
That’s an excellent comparison! I’m not saying this is a good product, or a product the world needs, just that it’s a product you could sustainably sell to the right douchebags.
This reminds me of the time the heating element on my toaster broke and I sold it to a rich guy for $400 by telling him it was a fancy kind of bread dispenser.
Juicer-oh, GOOP; does anyone else feel like, in addition to waxed moustaches, another turn of the century thing that’s come back into fashion is the snake oil salesman?
