Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/02/04/russian-priests-must-stop-bles.html
…
1 Like
that’s their line?
5 Likes
Russian priests must stop blessing nuclear weapons, says soon-to-be ex Russian Orthodox Church patriarch
Fixed. This one will require a light touch, so Tsar Vlad will probably dig up something from the Lubyanka archives that will induce a heart attack. “He was old man! These things happen!”
12 Likes
There goes the +1 holy damage buff.
17 Likes
I understand that the Catholic and orthodox churches can’t draw too strongly on the Bible without invalidating themselves, but come on. How do you get from “Thou shalt not kill” and “Turn the other cheek” to “Jesus smiles on this intercontinental ballistic missile”?
12 Likes
Righteousness, it’s not a sin if you think you are being righteous.
8 Likes
I assume this is because Jews were instrumental in developing them?
Russian Orthodox Patriarch announces church-government inquiry to prove that the Tsar was killed in 1917 as part of a Jewish ritual
3 Likes
now that’s a nuclear take 
2 Likes
From day one, basically.
6 Likes
“Caedite eos. Novit enim Dominus qui sunt eius.”
– Arnaud Amalric
“Nuke them all. God will know His own.” (freely translated)
7 Likes
Which is to say they made up whatever self-serving lie they liked, as needed, and don’t sweat it when that lie is in direct conflict with Jesus’ actual teachings.
I guess if I’m being fair, I need to acknowledge that Constantine predates the gelling of the Bible as we know it. Hard to say what connections there were between the Christianity he knew and the version the Pope and evangelicals riff on today.
5 Likes
20 Likes
I give it a week before he mysteriously dies after drinking tea.
4 Likes
The Russian Orthodox Church is effectively a propaganda arm of Putin’s Russia, but I guess they need to keep up the appearance of not working together.
6 Likes
I wonder if they could start doing the blessings as a double-bill with baptisms?
Nothing says “I am the Alpha and the Omega; the beginning and the end” quite like a ceremony to welcome both babies and bombs into the orthodox community. And the wrong sort of parents would love it!
2 Likes
It will be served from the so-called Sayonara Samovar.
2 Likes
Pretty much the same way all the other Christian denominations do. Come on; look at the Evangelicals.
2 Likes
