Scotland's official plan if the Loch Ness Monster is found


So I hear.



Which reminds me of the old joke:
Q. What does a Scotsman wear beneath his kilt?
A. Shoes.


The truth is much more terrifying.


Hmm. Sometime in the 1980ies I saw a sketch on a British TV channel.
The setup was a scotsman sitting in a cinema between two little old ladies. Wearing a kilt. With a sporran. A sporran with an animal’s head on it. Possibly a fox or a badger, I forget.
First little old lady starts to pet the head on the sporran, thinking it’s a lapdog.
Scotsman politely points out to her that she is stroking his sporran.
Second little old lady exclaims, “What? I’ve been feeding it bisquits for the last half hour!”



I think of all the crypto creatures in the world, Lochness Monster seems impossible. There would have to be a breeding population and there simply is not enough food sources for even one to live, let alone fiftyor so. There may be a bizarre animal that lives in the lake, but it’s not a pleisiosaur. I’m all about the Yeti though… YetiLives.


Something like that ski-fi tropiness, and in Scotland, it involves a spell broken only by Andy Murray:


You will yet understand the “multidimensional” aspect of the cryptid paradox, padawan.





Batter and deep-fry it?


I am willing to volunteer to become Nessie.

Scientists find strong evidence for an underground lake on Mars

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