Since when did breaking into houses to take a bath – and perhaps enjoy a meal – become a thing?


#1

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/04/19/since-when-did-breaking-into-h.html


#2

Usually the goal of a home burglary is to get in and out of the house as quickly as possible.

You’d think so, but I’ve heard too many stories from burglary victims about the thief taking a dump in the toilet (unflushed, natch) and/or helping himself to a snack from the fridge before leaving with the loot. Things like that give a sense of violation that the actual theft doesn’t.

This bath phenomenon seems different, though. Maybe drugs are involved, or maybe they’re cable TV addicts who just want a small taste of a life they’ve seen portrayed on-screen but will never be able to afford.


#3

Having returned from a two-week Xmas vacation back east, school friends and I (working and then rooming together for a time) discovered that our shared apartment had been broken into. Not much to steal (we were just starting out), but the thief or thieves took the time to make a shake in our blender. Not pretty after a number of days.


#4

#5

Crooks are not like you and me.


#6

Upon reading this, my first thought was that the rampant rise in homelessness as of late may be a factor.

But then again, I once had someone covertly break into my room in a co-op one New Year’s Eve, while tripping off ecstasy and who knows what else.

He or she didn’t take or break anything; and the only reason I even know about it at all is because a full month later, I discovered two dated “journal entries” that had been written down on a drawing pad of mine.


#7

Da FUQ. This would have creeped the hell out of anyone. I hope you didn’t suffer from all the things I can imagine right now.

We had a junkie climb through an open back window in our co-op, and leaving the same route quickly with my flatmate’s laptop. She just had opened said window and left the room for half a minute, coming back from her jogging routine and having had a quick shower. Saw him climb out. Ran after him, through the front door. Sprinted, confronted, got her laptop back.

She switched rooms with someone, eventually, and moved out after some time. She felt bloody violated, and somehow unsafe in that room. And she is a very strong person, intellectually, mentally and even physically.

BTW, her PhD thesis was on this computer. In case you wonder why.


#8

Well at least they’re leaving handy DNA evidence.


#9

Successfully defended her PhD thesis against…the bath and burgle and whatever it is you say to get the thing back entire instead of whatever ‘or I will cut you’ brings. And a peer and advisors. They just tack on a JD right there, or do you have to bring the burgletotes in as a TA?

Amazon Drones are going to be doing this. Not the people, their time’s too overbooked. Benderflew, I choose you not!


#10

Cup of… Oxo? Had to look that up and if i understand correctly… a cup of plain broth? Ew.


#11

Yeah, I’d go for the stuff I can’t afford.


#12

When all the Swamps Are Drained, and we’re all covered in shit and hungry, we’ll have the same goal.


#13

Naked? :open_mouth:

Dayum, girl…


#14

Should be large, red/black poly dipped grippable topical oxycodone that only comes loose when you’re halfway done cleaning the bath. [Side-eyes branding on ‘better bullion’ around.]


#15

At a quick skim, this is garble, I actually have to read your posts word for word to know that they really do make sense.

I don’t know whether to be impressed or depressed! :thinking::joy:


#16

He’s making fun of the over-rated kitchen gadgets. I’ll go get you a pic…

image


#17

We’re not sure Flossy isn’t an emerging AI. We Like Flossy.


#18

I get it, it’s just not readily apparent at first read, and there’s a hell of a lot more packed in as well!

I think @Flossaluzitarin is some kind of super-genius that simultaneously pulls together a multitude of disparate threads of reality into any perception and can distill that into the smallest possible number of words.

I am in awe…


#19


#20

I’ll have what he’s having! :rofl: