Soft, big Lucky Charms marshmallows headed to stores

boing
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Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/08/11/soft-oversized-lucky-charms-m.html

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Another case of inedible “food” being sold to us nostalgia junkies. Each of us of a certain age will buy a bag, eat one of each color, make our kids try one, then toss the rest in the compost pile.

“They’re after me lucky wallet!”

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So then these aren’t oversized Lucky Charms marshmallows. They’re just regular marshmallows dyed and cut to look like Lucky Charms marshmallows. Though that doesn’t matter much to me: I ate enough of both types as a kid that I don’t need (or want) any more.

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Soft? Blasphemy!

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church lady

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These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration . This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

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You can just open the bag and leave them out.

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These will be perfect in liquid nitrogen! I just need to find a bitters to match each color.

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40 years. I have been waiting FORTY YEARS for this. This had better not be some short term promo BS.

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Plastic foam packing peanuts in four fun-colours™.

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My brain kept telling me these were not the right colors and repeating the mantra I learned as a kid in the 80s:

“Pink hearts orange stars yellow moons green clovers blue diamonds and purple horse-shoooooes”

I didn’t realize how many times they’d changed.

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NO YOU CAN’T. I tried that as a kid. Marshmallows just turn crappy if you leave them out.

Besides, everyone knows that Lucky Charms “marshmallows” aren’t REAL marshmallows. They’re concentrated DELICIOUSNESS, and the disproportionate ratio of bland cat chow (which is what the non-marshmallow bits actually are) to “marshmallows”, like any good prohibitionary system, only heightened the yum-factor.

This new “development” looks simply awful, like the flavored marshmallows that Kraft made back in the 1970s and which every jello + fruit ambrosia awfulness contained in copious amounts.

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These aren’t the chalky little marshmallows you’ll find in Lucky Charms cereal.

Count me out then.

Those chalky little marshmallows are far superior to the genuine article.

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I never knew they had been changing, or multiplying, because I left Lucky Charms behind in the 80s, but when I saw this I looked at the list and thought, “Where the hell are the diamonds? Weren’t there blue diamonds? Now there are unicorns? What?”

Weird.

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That makes no sense in the context of this discussion.

Anyhow, I think it’s time for a smoke.

(edit)

So yeah. wow… I’m thinking wow like maybe you have a … like … good point… hmmm…

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