Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2024/05/05/stain-stonewashed-jeans-look-like-you-peed-yourself.html
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Coincidence?
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Not at all. These are obviously marketed to MAGAts and their little MAGAmuffins to wear at those long Turmp rallies.
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There’s a huge money-making opportunity here for whoever wants to organize TaskRabbit gig workers to provide a bespoke artisanal jeans-pissing service. Think of it: just download the PissMyJeans app, enter your address and pants size, and within minutes a worker will be there to moisten the crotch of your favorite denims with a 100% authentic spreading stain. No more paying $800 for imitations: get the real thing for a tenth of the price!
Brb, just securing my Series A funding …
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Uberpiss probably has that sewn up already.
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The bladder fraction’s a bit particular, as if you’ve perfected microdose ayahuasca and had a 2 second journey. Otherwise consistent enough with just wearing the jeans and never washing your selvedge etc. etc. Why would there not also be a choad wear pattern or hand stitching to mend it? Inset dual wielding hammer slings, I say. Decide later if you should have it stained to illustrate how the claw side opened you up. The outer thighs are for peekaboos and grimoire holsters ofc.
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Brought to you by Calico Cut Pants™️!
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I’m more a DIY guy
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Trick is to stain them with unadulterated child’s piss, then wring them out whenever you need to do a drug test. Completely avoids the need for fallible gadgets.
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I’m pretty certain “currently unavailable” or “sold out” means, "we only made one, took some pictures, and got a lot of free publicity.
a/k/a pre-muddied Nordstrom “Barracuda straight leg jeans” (sorry, the link won’t paste the thumbnail).
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I’ve got enough pee for my current pants, and more!
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Rule 1 of teen fashion: If the parents hate it, it sells.
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Real Men Wear Diapers tho amirite???
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wait until you see the back view of the product
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Get in the back of the van!
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I visited the website, so you don’t need to bother.
They are rubbish at making jeans:
Not 'shopped.
Oh, well I never, half-price 'cos we fucked up the zipper.
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ENHANCE!
There’s also a zipper down the buttcrack?
I guess I just don’t understand fashion.
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