Yeah, whatâs up with Rob posting something like that? Must have been a temporary error of judgement, I guess.
Good reason for repeal, if thatâs the case.
The most recent segment of an unending line
Perhaps Golden was too intoxicated to make an executive decision?
Going to voice an unpopular opinion and sound callous and brutal but how about getting used to the fact that in life you may see unpleasant things instead of expecting others to protect you from it?
From the headline, itâs a given itâs related to a violent attack. If then seeing said attack in the article comes as a shock in this day and age, then the problem is yours to deal with.
I get trigger warnings for details of rape/sexual violence/murder/torture as they are horrific beyond the boundaries of what most people should ever be subjected to and not the kind of thing victims should have to deal with out of the blue and a little decency regarding such things isnât amiss.
Why must me protect your overly fragile souls because itâs merely difficult and uncomfortable to watch?
And I say this as a survivor of abuse of all kinds so itâs not as though merely calling âbut abuse victims!â has credence. To survive, face your fears until theyâre no longer a problem. Donât cry TRIGGER WARNING and expect people to pity and pander to you.
HonestlyâŚpeople think life should be so easy and nice and then complain when reality depicts something else.
When the post originally went up, it was also accompanied by a GIF of the attackâif you logged onto the BB homepage (which, if you have a forum account, you probably would) youâd have no way of avoiding it. Itâs not like you could go âoh, an article about assault! I will stay away from that!â Thereâs an image of it being shoved right in front of you on a site that typically doesnât show violent assaults on its front page in full motion.
Hey, mate? As an abuse and violence victim myself, I wouldnât dream of condescending to the experience youâd had. But you should also remember you donât speak for all victims of abuse any more than I do. âSuck it up, you wimpâ might work for some people, but for others, we appreciate being able to make informed decisions when encountering depictions of violence. Maybe you should accept that people react to trauma differently than you.
I wouldnât go so far as to characterize an inebriated backseat driverâs tantrum slapping fit as âgraphic violenceâ.
Sadly, it has nothing to do with the legality of videotaping somebody and everything to do with Californiaâs laws related to recording conversations without two party consent. A person has a reasonable expectation that their conversations within a car are private, provided the windows arenât down and theyâre not in a very crowded place. Itâs actually not a matter of communication being âconfidentialâ, just âprivateâ. Hereâs a quick explainer on the law: http://www.dmlp.org/legal-guide/california-recording-law
It will be interesting to see if the defendantâs lawyers can successfully argue that this doesnât apply in the context of âride sharingâ
I understand thatâs how people from Jersey greet each other , but still was a bit too vivid for me.
I know people deal with trauma in different ways (Iâm more than familiar with this, in fact.) but those who scream âTRIGGER WARNINGâ the loudest are the ones not dealing with their issues at all (why else would they cry for one after theyâve seen it? A childlike, illogical response is indicative of someone who has yet to learn that those childish patterns of behaviour they learned are of little use in the big bad world.)
What Iâm saying is, is that people need to take a reality check and realise that no matter how much they cry and shout and demand, they canât take the memories (of the trauma or the trigger) away and must learn to cope reasonably because there will always be more triggers hiding just around the corner.
And unfortunately, thereâs only various degrees of bluntness in which to frame that truth when dealing with strangers online because someone has to shout just as loud back without resorting to name calling to balance things out (I know itâs pointless but if just one person reads and realises, Iâve done some good.)
I feel so much for everyone thatâs suffered abuse of any kind but there really is no nice way to tell people thereâs nothing they can do but learn to cope with it through a long, difficult and often painful process.
Letting alone the condescending parenthetical that follows this quote, hereâs the thingânot everyone can be asked to deal with their trauma all the time. And thereâs no consistent progress in dealing with itâsome days, stuff like the above clip wonât faze you at all, some days it will. Can you develop coping mechanisms? Yes, of course. Can content publishers help by letting you make reasonably informed decisions about what you might have to experience? Yes.
There is nothing unreasonable about a trigger warning for violence or abuseâI understand that a lot of people like to deploy the âslippery-slopeâ argument, but it just doesnât hold water when a site that isnât known for putting graphic violence on the front page breaks with that and could reactivate someoneâs trauma.
And the whole âhey, this is just how the world worksâ argument really doesnât hold water on the Internet. This is, in point of fact, the most variable and mutable communication tool in human history. Youâre not really going to convince me that someone canât write two to three words and move one image under cut because itâs unreasonably hard.
Maybe, instead of telling other people to suck it up, you could acknowledge that the Internet offers new possibilities for communication that allow people with serious trauma to avoid having that trauma inflicted on them, rather than just throwing your hands up and saying thereâs nothing to be doneâor, worse still, accusing the people asking for such reforms to suck it up because you and others canât be bothered to consider the ramifications of your behavior on others.
The parentheticals were to denote speech, although my use of capitals made that less apparent. Nothing condescending about it. I donât have problems with people putting up trigger warnings. I have a problem with people demanding them as though theyâre some special snowflake too precious to see a man being beaten around the head.
If someone puts up a trigger warning then thatâs fine. Good for them, theyâre decent enough to think of other people. But if they donât? Well the world still continues to turn, we go through a tough patch and then we move on. Given time and as long we donât play the victim or martyr, we realise that weâre not kids or weak people any more and can remind ourselves that the map is not the territory: itâs just our bodies reacting to false stimuli and can shut down any further reactions before they begin.
Itâs far from easy to do but surely the longer objective of being all but free of these problems is preferable?
And for all the communication about this subject thatâs gone on online, just what has happened? The spread of the term has become prevalent, making it harder to help people who need help because they think by being loud and demanding itâll make it all okay, yet still disturbing content gets posted without warnings and still they cry and moan. This will never change, that is why itâs how things work because for all the technology in the world, it doesnât change the fact that itâs people sat behind every piece of content at the end of the day.
I know you will argue my points using your flawed reasoning because you, along with thousands of others would rather take the short term benefit of not being triggered over the longer term benefit of barely having the triggers. (I am aware that an inability to delay gratification is a common human flaw, but it s that: a flaw.) And ultimately nothing will change. But just because you are legion, and just because you are loud, doesnât mean you are right.
Much the same as openly attacking people with such views isnât right or helpful.
Just donât conflate the harshness of an unpleasant truth with someone being deliberately mean, bullying or nasty, however.
Bad shit happens to good people. Good people have to deal with the repercussions and go through hell to overcome these things. This cannot be argued. You either deal with in the short term by demanding warnings on/censoring/burying content that reminds you the world is unfair or you buckle down for the long game, suck it up and fight.
Iâve already expressed that you donât speak for all victims off abuse, so please do not presume to tell me or someone else that we are âplaying the victim,â as though itâs a role we choose to put on. That is incontrovertibly condescending.
I think we owe it to the other users to leave the topic alone after thisâneither of us is making any headway, and weâre both quite a ways away from the topic of the initial postâbut Iâd encourage you to examine the reflex that leads to your hostility towards triggers in the future. Maybe next time, you should consider what the other person is saying without immediately falling back on the culturally-libertarian frat-bro logic of âgah, weâre raising a nation of fucking PUSSIES!â Because, if weâre being honest, throwing your hands up and saying ânothing to be done about itâthe people who canât hack it are just gonna have to sufferâ is an infinitely more cowardly response.
Who screamed?
This topic was automatically closed after 5 days. New replies are no longer allowed.