Ted Cruz: The Gays are waging 'jihad' against 'religious freedom'

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Claiming there’s a ā€œjihadā€ against religion, specifically the Christian right? Oh, the irony.

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No they aren’t.

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Good thing that ā€œreligious freedomā€ does not mean ā€œaccording to doctrine of Christian fundiesā€, but they seem to have some cognitive dissonance about this.

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Any chance he’ll begin crusading for the US gov’t to adopt sharia Christian laws to make us safer?

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Like mad-libs, but actually teabag-libs.

Pick an enemy
Pick a verb from the hate list
Pick a noun from the love list
Put it in a blender, spread on the area to receive the teabagging, and wait for it to tingle!

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ā€œWhy are these people shooting back at us? JIHADISTS!ā€

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So, Ted, are the homosexualists actually aligned with zealots from perhaps the only abrahamic monotheism that likes them even less than you do, or did you just choose ā€˜jihad’ in a contemptibly cynical and rather transparent attempt to make them sound scarier?

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Can’t they just keep it at home? Why do they have to talk about it in public where I now have to explain it to my child? (their crazy religious politics, I mean)

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Maybe he just read Frank Herbert’s Dune series and liked the idea of using ā€œjihadā€ as a catch-all term for ā€œviolent struggle to impose a new social order.ā€

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Can we just fast forward to when he doesn’t make it out of the primaries?

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Part of me says yes, but part of me wants to see the slow-motion car crash his campaign could turn into.

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Isn’t he the one who recently spoke up against freedom of belief and action?

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Jihad!

It’s not just for orange juice anymore.

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Not my favorite feature of Dune.

But I think that this is a PR trick. He’s implied there’s some sort of connection between unrelated social forces, thus multiplying the negative associations in his audience’s mind. If a journalist actually calls him on it, he’ll just say it was an analogy, and move on to his next unfounded claim.

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ā€œthe biblical teaching that marriage is the union of one man and one womanā€

Where is this mystical bible they keep referring to? The editions I’ve read must be different.

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I would start praying for this if I could be assured the prayers would actually work.

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PS: What an asshole.

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Want to have some fun with these people? Replace ā€œjihadā€ with ā€œcrusade.ā€ It’s a pretty good translation.

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Thank goodness there’s no such thing as LGBTQI Christians, or straight Christians who support LGBTQI rights. It would make things difficult for Cruz if there were, you know, some overlap. Fortunately the two groups are distinct and monolithic, making the us versus them very easy.

Of course I’m being sarcastic. I just can’t tell whether Cruz is stupid enough to really think that or if he’s just pandering to his supporters who believe it really is that simple.

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