Texas man finds fossils from Noah's flood in his backyard

boing
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Where did all that water go anyways…

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It’s true. I can find pictures of him riding a dinosaur and holding a gun, but am having no luck with the hat and the corndog.

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Eww! 

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The Bible actually says Noah was supposed to take seven pairs of the clean animals. So that still means only two Texans.

P.S. I’m not degrading Texans. It’s just that humans aren’t considered clean, food-wise. I think.

Edit: removed duplicate word.

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You are wrong, look at the evidence: Jesus riding a dinosaur while holding a gun and a corndog

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Where ever it went, it went clockwise above the equator, and anti-clockwise below the equator. Or was it the international date line?

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Not finding the word “pliocene” in this thread after a search, I was just about to post that :slight_smile:

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Austin does seem to be more liberal than the rest of the state. Maybe it could be like Berlin during the Cold War.

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Magic, duh. Which also explains: where the water came from, how any plants and aquatic animals survived, how the animals got to the ark, how the animals re-distributed themselves afterwards, how they survived on the ark, how the fossils formed, how geological features formed…

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Still too much to pay for that. Maybe when it goes on sale.

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Any sufficiently advanced technology would be indistinguishable from magic…

…so God is the uber-geek!

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Unfortunately that doesn’t work in reverse (“any magic is indistinguishable from sufficiently advanced technology”). No matter how many chickens I sacrifice nor magic dances I do, no one mistakes me for a really, really advanced coder.

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I’m fully on board with the “Jesus was a dinosaur” crowd.

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How could I have forgotten that valuable piece of history?!?

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The Ark was like the Tardis, bigger inside than out. The figures in the Bible are external measurements.

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Real-life equivalent, from the crank journal “Bipedia”:

PRELIMINARY STUDY AND FIRST PHOTOGRAPHS
OF A SMALL SKULL OF HUMAN TYPE
FOUND IN MOROCCO

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So… if the Ark is like the Tardis, was god a time lord? Wouldn’t that be a hell of a twist?

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Good god, the stupid, it burns.
Shit like this makes me envy Mark Watney.