The Jedi Master of youth soccer

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/08/06/the-jedi-master-of-youth-socce.html

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Okay, by the third time, it is no accident. This kid just has natural abilities when it comes to using a ball to harm his opponents.

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Reminds me of playing fullback and taking three nutshots in a row from a much bigger player attempting corner kicks, until he finally changed tactics.

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As a soccer coach, I’ve seen that very thing happen many a time. It is one of the primary reasons we teach from day one for kids to make touches on the ball remain on the ground, it is safer for sure, but also much better and more sound soccer play. We also teach them small touches not SMASH THE BALL. controlled small touches lead to better soccer play.

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Please help … can’t stop watching.

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Why is nobody stopping him?

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From what I remember of soccer, watching my sister and brother play, the parents were likely screaming “KILL THEM ALL, TREVOR! KILL THOSE KIDS! KICK THEM IN THE NUTS!!!”

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those bastards. I literally have stopped games and walked over to the parents side and said “If you cannot be encouraging and positive to all these kids I will have you removed from the sideline”. I encourage our refs to stop games and control parents if need be as they have the discretion to do so. I also before every season starts remind parents of the rules of the association and that their conduct matters.

Some of them are ridiculous.

@anon48584343 What is there to stop? He is supposed to be kicking the ball. And getting whacked in the face, while sucky for the other kid, is a part of the dangers of playing soccer. My daughter has broken two girls ankles while making proper text book sliding tackles for the ball. She also on another occasion took a free direct kick straight to the face, and was the first one to get to the ball after it ricocheted off her. The opposing player came in to defend and take the ball and my daughter upended the girl and she broke her arm as she landed awkwardly. It is not a sport without potential injury or dangerous play.

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There was one Scottish dad who was an absolute pleasure to hear while swearing at his son to literally rip the genitals off other players and stomp on them. Something about that accent.

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Red team is doing a bang-up job of face-blocking!

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This is a (reverse?) metaphor for so many aspects of modern life. I laughed and then I cried.

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interestingly enough. The ref should have called a whistle on one of these hits and stopped play to give the green team a free indirect kick. Heading the ball in U11 or lower age groups is restricted and yes they aren’t intending to head the ball, it is interpreted that way.

At that same time, he should talk directly to that player and instruct him that keeping the ball on the ground is proper safe play.

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Do you want a ball in the face?

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The ref looks like they are about to blow their whistle after the second one.

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It is best that they learn that they do not want to be like Jamie Pollock early in life.

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Nope.

faceball4

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I present…the man, the myth, the legend…

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I did karate for many years, i have been kicked in the balls a few times. Though in the moment i didn’t actually feel anything thankfully, adrenaline helped i presume, but i have seen other people just keel over and have trouble breathing. It sucks when that happens.

Also playing soccer i took a crazy hard kick to my shin from someone almost twice my size and twice as muscular. Amusingly his foot took a harder hit than i did, i just stood there while he dropped in pain. I’m starting to think there’s something wrong with my pain tolerance? :stuck_out_tongue:

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well. you were wearing shin guards which protected your shin from the blow. his foot (presumably the top or interior toe) is not padded against anything whatsoever.

Or as my spouse points out you can be a mutant like me…the tibialis anterior muscles on my lower legs are way over developed. they actually flex over my shin bones and provide a huge padding when playing soccer with the kids (I’ve been coaching U6-U19 for about 10 years now).

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I did have my shin guards on, the kick hurt like hell but not something that would’ve incapacitated me from playing so i was relatively ok. The other guy though was out of the game, the sight was pretty confusing for those on the sidelines considering i was tiny in comparison. I also played defense a lot so i was used to getting kicked on occasion :stuck_out_tongue:

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