These luxurious bed sheets are a steal at only $33

boing
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Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2016/09/28/these-luxurious-bed-sheets-are.html

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Are they also artesian made, organic microfiber and Bluetooth enabled?

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I prefer my sheets to be woven from something more durable, like ipe. Or maybe even a blend with whalebone.

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What’s the origin and cocoa content of the chocolate sheets? Because I won’t stay in bed for anything less than 40% Belgian or Swiss.

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When you follow this site from the BBS end, then in the first few paragraphs there is always this fun little guessing game whether those things are supposed to be wonderful things or just BB Store trash.

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But the Austrian Zotter has more fun chocolate bars, like apple/carrot/ginger.

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That would clash with my curtains, delicious as it sounds.

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How about whalebone and fibers recovered from the Rainbow Warrior?

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Since that’s the name of my university’s athletic teams I wouldn’t be surprised if I can buy official “Rainbow Warrior” bedsheets on campus.

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I was thinking of the Eco-terrorist ship

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You mean the peaceful protest ship that murderous French intelligence agents blew up, for which they served a measly 2 year sentence on a tropical island.

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Either way whalebone and recovered fibers

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(Yes, I got it at the first post.)

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Who here thinks it’s a great idea to buy cheap bedsheets sight unseen from the internet? Hands?

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Maybe better buying em here than “pre stained” off eBay

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“Don’t worry about thread count, our technique does away with such antiquated measurement systems to declare our sheets are 6,784 Comforta Units, which is the highest Comforta Units sheet there is!”

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Guys, Google this. I’m seeing the same sheets selling for less elsewhere. No one is charging, or paying “$120.”

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The same people who pay the same price for a full set as a king do!

Seriously, there’s half as much fabric in a full as in a king, you don’t pay the same price.

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The cool thing about these sheets is that since you’re buying them through BB, you never need to wash them. After several months your body’s natural oils coat the sheets and make them self-regulating (as long as you never shower, that is). It’s sort of a symbiotic relationship.

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Only 70% off our 200% inflated price.

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