Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/05/27/three-young-brothers-made-a-bl.html
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Quick, get somebody in the White House to forward this idea to Trump.
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dammit, radioactive spider! the key is radioactivity; just watch Chernobyl. As an aside:
No word on whether they can now sling webs.
You just know some Spiderman aficionado has a spreadsheet which indicates which year (1962-present) of Spiderman had acquired the biological capacity to “sling webs” (Toby Maguire) versus the Christmas-toyetic requirement to have a strap on appliance (Andrew Garfield). It appears to alternate from one Spiderman reboot to the next.
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I distinctly remember being about 5 years old and sitting on the monkey bars at the park. A kid came up and asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I said, “Spiderman. But I have to find the right spider to bite me.” We both nodded our heads in agreement at such an obviously great answer. I never found that spider (but I also never wanted to actually get bit).
30 some odd years later I’d rather be Batman.
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I mean - I get it… just, not a black widow, guys! And it has to be radioactive. Do you even read the comics?? 
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Not just any run-of-the-mill radioactivity; has to be the sort of radioactivity produced by fantastic looking machines. Now your bomb/nuclear waste kind of radioactivity, that just gives you gigantic, menacing spiders.
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As a kid, after watching Popeye a few too many times and being convinced that I was being denied my superpowers, I at one point demanded that my mom make me spinach for dinner. She knew I wouldn’t like it, but to her credit obliged me anyway. When I sat down and had some, I immediately lost my faith in the message of cartoons. And today, I still don’t really care much for spinach. My point is that kids are stupid.
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Me, I’d rather be Bruce Wayne.
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There can be only one… Spiderman!
It’s right there in the name; Spiderman, not Spidermany.
I’m surprised all three went along with that idea. Capture the spider, let one get bit and monitor the situation. Roshambo if you have to. Come on guys, think. /s
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I got hit by 480 volts AC once, phase to phase in one hand out the other. The only thing i have in common with Magneto however is authritis.
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Don’t the Raimi movies use a genetically engineered spider?
Of course, the Raimi movies are problematic.
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I love that they didn’t stop after the first or second getting bit.
depends on how “realistic” the writers think they’re supposed to be
and whether they want to frame Peter Parker as a genius or a regular kid
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Generally speaking, black widow bites are not life-threatening but hurt amazingly.
There are exceptions, though. Small children are one of them; the venom causes muscle spasms including abdominal cramps and sometimes cardiac dysrhythmias.
Those spasms can also induce miscarriage in pregnant women (happened to a friend.) Yes, I suppose someone desperate to end a pregnancy might try it but I have it on very good authority that it’s a really, really bad choice of methods.
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Perhaps the bite gave him the proportionate genius of a spider?
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when i was a kid, we collected black widows and threw about 6 or 8 of them into an empty fish tank and kept a board over it. not because we wanted to get them to bite us and turn us into spider-man, but because we wanted them to FIGHT each other. turns out, they wouldn’t, much to our disappointment. as i recall, my friend’s mom was quite upset when she discovered the tank in the basement.
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The Maguire idea came from a failed James Cameron Spiderman script. Of course it adds an puberty/ick factor since we have a teenage guy nobody producing a white sticky…
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My father remembers when the first Superman comic appeared. He said all over the country, there was a tidal wave of kids with broken arms and legs, and some deaths, because a kid would read the comics, tie a table cloth around his neck like a cape, and jump off the house roof trying to fly.
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But there’s two in the comics right now.
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