BLASPHEME!
Your form is an abomination! Only shells striving to attain the golden ratio reflect the True Form of God!
11 Likes
I know they can climb across rocks for short distances,
but I’m really going to start worrying when they evolve into Zardalu:
Edit: Miss you, CS
6 Likes
Wow, took me a moment to realize it wasn’t a scene from an Alien movie I missed.
2 Likes
I’m, reminded of the line from The Technicolor Time Machine, from the movie executive who has looking into the prehistoric ocean, “The eyes! The eyes! The teeth! The teeth!”
Bon appétit…
F͞ͅí̺͈̹͖r̢s͏͔̖t̪̭̩̦ ̬̪̹̰̻̞w͈̝̱̝̪e̫̪̥̲͜ ̘̪̭̤͉̥̰m̥͎̬̩̬u̮̙ş̲̥͎t͇̥̲̰̺ͅͅ ̷͈̬̦d̲̰̣̳̲ę̙t̖̫e͈̰̯̻̖r̖͕͚͇̱͘mi͝n͕̪͙̤è͓̩̘̼̩ ̖̤̖͔͝t̖̫̥̱̻̜he͖͖ ͇̟̫̟͚s̷u̴͎̦̠̗͖ͅm̖͕͜m̗͔o̪͙͍͇͠n̞̮͔̰̙̣i̵͓̩̳ͅͅn̢͈̦g͏̩͕̲ͅ ͟e̻͝ͅņ̳̳̮̥͇̼c͕̭̩̬͉̫͇l͚̯͇̙̼̫͍͞o͇̣s̴͓͍̰̣̘u̵ṟ͔̺̘͓̦̗͡e̯̠̩̖̪͘ͅ.̪͓͢ͅ.̸.̼̭
⎕̵Ì͓O͝←̧0͈̬͎͝
̪ ̝ ̤͚̞͕͡ ͈̬̤̳̖͖ͅ ̲̟̼̝̰̲̯ ̯̹̠̣v̴͈͙i̵̲͕ṟ͙͈͍g̴̹̖͎͚͓͎̜i̝ņ̭͖̲s̝̠̜̞͢←҉̺̼(̀⊂͓̮̕⍋̥̬͖̟̻⊃҉↓̗̀⍵͍̫̖)̴͎͔͍⌷͇̥͓̙̩̖̙[̸̻̙1̷̞̲̩͓̱͈̥]͍̼̖̘͍͚⍵̟͚͔͎͈ ̷̖ ͖ ̝ ͠ ̩̱̰̤͖̝ ̗̲̕ͅͅ ̷ ̴ ̯̹͎̫̬̜ͅ ̗͙͝ ͕͞ ̪̲̻̩̤͖ ͇ ͇͉ ̷͇͉͖̖̯̪ ̵͉͚͔ ̴ ̵̝̳ ̟̫͈͔̲ ̤̰ ̧
̩̟̬̰̤͕ ͓̩͍̼͜ ̠̘̞̬̞͓ ̹͟ ̸͍͕͉͖p͘h̙s̼̬̩͚←̧̘{ ̴̣ ̰̺̪̘̠ ̙̥̱̰̳̪ ̵͔͖̠͍̼̟ͅ ̛̲͇̺̼͇̣ ̼̖̘ ͈̹͔͇̼ ͎̭̖̬̮ ̶̙ ̣ ͉̺̹͍̳̱̺ ͏̤̪̱̠ ̖̹̹͈͍͞ ͎̘̳̭̬̘̕ ̨̩̖͍ ̘̰̬̮̰̳͜ ̪̥͚͈̻ ̢̤̳ ̱̭͙͙͡ͅ ̮̞͝ ̣̗͚̻͝ ͚̱̟̱̫ͅ ̖͓̙ ̰̥̘̱̻͟ ̢ ̪̜͘ ̴̹̳̜͖͓ ̣̘̝̫ ̮̳̭͙̜͖ͅ ͔̮͙̦͚ ͇͚̜͔͍͙̲̕ ̴̮̪͍̟ͅ ̸̜̙̝̭̳
̴͚̲ ̱̹͟ ̻ ̭ ̸͚̱̠̻͍̬ ̖̥̺̭ ͇̪̮̳͔̙ͅ ̝̦̰̱̟͔ͅ ͎͎̰̯ͅ ̶͙͔̯x̦̳ ̠͔͍͖̰͙̠y͘ͅ←̴̯͖̥̫⊂̫̭̞̙̰̻̣[̕1̯̦̮̠↓̗⍳̧⍴͎͍̠̜̥̙͞⍴͉̺͉͜⍵҉̫͕]͉̻̻⍵̻̥ ̗̭̼̠͚͈ ̼̺͎͎̘̰ ̲̻͍͎̹ͅ ̰̤͖ ̹̬ ͓̳̼͝ ̴͉͉ ̢̜̞͎ ̞͔͔͎͎ ̶̪͙͔͚̺ ͔͉͉ ̝ ̸̯͔̖̩͚̦ ̳̞ ͍̗ ̵ ̣̟̜ ̧̲̜̫̯̫̻
̢̫̰͚͕͇ ͍̱͔̪̩ ͔̪̲̪̮͍ ̸ ̼͟ ̗̟̹̤̣ ̰̀ ̱̮͙͎̲͎ ̸͓ ͈̩͍͢x̮̜̩̼0͍̹͍͔̭͔ ̱̼̺̳̤̳ͅx͕̘n̘̻̦̦←̶͎̱̻̹̘̜1͉͓̳̩͈͢ͅ ̵0̢̝̺̘̝̜̠̣=̟⊂̷̗̘̮̫̖̘̫0͏=̧͓͎͕̞̭̠͔x̱̗͍̀ ҉͓̣̭͉̹͈̝ ̰͙̰̟̰̠͢ͅ ̪͚̼̙̱͓͚͠ ̞ ̺̠̤͔̣ ̛ ̪̀ ̲͔͓͡ ̭̙ ̰̟̤̭͞ ̵̤ ͍̠͚͘ ̧̩̦̜̘ ̩̞̟ ̙͎̬̲̦ ̡̲̟̺̞̠̻̥ ̢̱̦̼̮ ̤̭̟̦̜͍́
̲̗͇̲͡ ̼̖̞͙̗̣ ̤͢ ̻͚̜̟͖͈̞ ̦͕̞͇̻̥ ̱͕̪̤̠̬ͅ ̙̮͍ͅ ̷̼͉̖̦͕̙̦ ͏̙̻̥͚̠̭̮t̟͍͉̙͎̣̕o͈̘̠̯͓p̤͞←̤̪͉͕̹̀(̬̹̝̗̻͕ͅx͎0̤̯̗͔×̥̲͜○̥̥̜̘̼͉̗0͉͓̖.̢̦̖̫̖5̢̼͍͍̲͚)+̶̬x͉͈̱̰̹ṉ͔×̼̭̼͓̠͙͢¯̸̞͙̜͖̳3͍͖̫̟̼͔○͔͉̩̬͉(̣|͔̻̟y̰͙̕)̞͚͎͖̤͙̗÷x̳͚̩͇̰+̤̼x̤̪̪͎0̰̪̞̟͈̞ ͉͈͍̙̹̹ ̤̲̘͎ ̜ ̦̙̗̻̼̕ ̖̞ ͔̭
͖̣͖̺̙͖͝ͅ ̜̞ ̺̟̠̲̰̝ͅ ͚̟̪͎ ̨ ͏͖̠̟ ̷ ͘ ̫(̝̟͚̟̭͎͇0̨∨̴̖̟͕͕.͙≠̳̘̙̭⍵͈͖̥̣̗̹͎)̼̲×̰ͅ(̪̼1̡̠̲̩̣̻̭-͔͙͢2×̰͕̥͓̩͢y͙͉̤̯̙̕<̷̦͕͎̰0́)×̖̙t̢̹̣̤̞̪̮o̜̭͈͓͚̼̺p͍̺̬̠̥̭͎+͏̘̬○̥͓̪͚̰̹͡x̶̻͇<͎̳͖͈̤̩͙0͈ ̩̜͓̥͡ ̢͎ ͈̲͙̻͓͕ ͝ ̪̳̼̮̺͎ ̴͇̞̘̙̺ ̻ ͔̮
̴̱̞̘̯̰ͅ ͕̤ ҉̣ ̬̘͖ ̛͎ ͍̙̼̘̖͇͢}̞̱̬̕
̹̖̲͖̞͡ͅ ͏ ̞͓̝̞͜ ̠̮͉̠ ̦̮̫ ̶̮̣̤͙͇̻̩a̢̳̦̮̝n̫g̪l͈̹͔̯̱̳ͅe͙s̲̹͕͙̦←̴̞͖͕p̛̱͍͇͓h̨̜̠s̹͎̜ͅ(̜͖́0̭̬̘̝͎̀ ̥͉1↓͞p͇̩͈t̠͈͚̬s͉̘͓̰ͅ)̪̟̹͍̱̥-̲͙͚͎[̞̣0̙̜̤̻̱͚͞]̬̯͔0̷͓͚̲̳⌷̣͙[͚̝̤́1̺͚̦̘̮]̙̘̘̰v̮̰̙̩ir̭̞͝g̯͎̳i҉̣̘͉̺̭n͍͈s̹̰͓ ̗͢ ̩͈̘͢ ̸̻͕̞̹̩̦ ̛͚̱͔ ̮̣͙ ̡͕͔ ͔͝ ͉͇̠͇
̳̘̘̣ ̥̦͟ ̯̣̫̫̺̪́ ͔̣͉̼̩͡ͅ ͏̞ ̻͟ix͝I̵̯̤͔n̙͙c̘̠̘̜̲a̬̤̘͙͞ṋ̛̳̳͇t←̡͔̹0̷̦̤̬͙̲̱,̯̣̻̺̤ͅ1̢+͕̥͔̞̫̭̳̀⊃̻̞͚a̩̻̮̰̕n͙͔̪̭̩g̫̝̟̪le̡̝̲s̴͉⍳̲̬̭̦⌊̠͇͚̺/͕̱͇ͅa̰͠n͍͇͕͙g̪͈̗͕̤l̦͡ḛ̬̠͓͉̞ͅs̴̤͈̗ ̴̜̥̩̲ ̰͇͖̻̤͙ ̼̮̲̼̟̪ ̖ ͏͓̝̞̠̼͉̼ ̧̙͚̻͇̥ ̩̻͚̘̹ ͉͈ ̲́ ͙̠̝̼̥̕
̘̦̯̮̤ ͏̯̹͖͈̖ ̷ ͖̼ ͍̘̩̺̯̞ ͎̺i̥͕̮̜xP͎̟̩̤̳̮e̳̣͈͎ṇ̴̪͚t̶̯͈͎̗a̷̩cl̠̥̰̙̮̠ͅe̥←͠{͖̙̝̭
͕̫̮̤̘̰́ ̺͍̭̫̼ ͏̻ ͚͈̟͍͠ ̪̀ ͎͍̤̼͜ͅ ͓̣͍̤͈ ̭̖͔̤̯ ͎̲̰̺̗̫͝ ̘͈̫̘͉i̶̻̘̖̘x̖̹͉̥͕͞0̢̲̤͇ ̻͖i̖̘̝̞̜̦ͅx̩̺̣͢1͏͈̳̟̲̫ͅ←̲͍͈̦̩̼¯͍̠͉̝̜̰̪͘2̫͚̮͉↑̯̻⍵ ̗̯̼̟̥̠̕ ̘̻̙̜̦̱̲ ͎͖ ҉̯̺ ̰̼͕̤͠ ̬̩̭̥̰̭̣ ̴̹̩̹͇͚͎̝ ̡̻ ̶͚̝͈ ̳̖̞̯̝ ̡̫̠̫̩ ̘̖̮͕ ̷̝̞̮̦͕ ̶͈̙̟̩ ̞̭̲͕̦̀ͅ ̥̰̙̻̺̩͕ ̟̥̠͇ ͓͓͉ ̟̥ ̴͔̩̞̻͍ ̨͈̗̳̠ ̮̳̹̤̙ ̹̖̜͖͎ͅ
̥̜̯̩̬̠͞ ̥̦̼͇͍͘ ̗ ͓͍͉̀ ̘̞̫̠̪͔ ͘ ͚̹̱ ̤̰̙͈͖ͅ ͔͕̳̲̙̝͔ ̰̭͉̖̬͕v̷̹̦͉←͎͍̼̠̳̳͎͘{̦͔̫̙̥̠̖͢⍵́+(⍵̀<̷̰0̳͇̗̦)̶̜̣͔̗̙͙̦×̯̜̭̹̲͓ͅ○2̬̖̣}͇̝̣̺p͙͙͍͜h͍͈͇̬̹͓͘ͅs̳̖̪̲̳̟̙ ͠ͅp̯t̜͚̙̬s͉̮͓̠͝-̹͓͜[̥̹̬̬ͅ0̤̗̙̙]̬̭͇̜̜̪i̠̦̞͎̭̞x̗͓̬̜̀1͈̥⌷̹͢[̞̱̗͎̣͖͓͠1̻͎͉̣̗͕]͓̥vi̻͓̦͙̱͉ͅr͏̦̱̟̙̘̖͉g̶̹̪̝̹i̬̝͎͚ṋ̶̹̳̖̹̥ś̹͙̜ ̣̣͙͜
̯̦̳ ̰̖̣̮ ̧͈̹̱͉ͅ ̳͔͉͈͔̯ ̮̞̤̥ ͙̤ ̱͖̥̩̟̀ ̴̙̻͓̹̠͚ ̱̹͉̰̜o̴̩͎͖̝͓̼t͢ͅh̢̥͙͙̗͍̯ͅe͖͉̫̲̼͞r̮̠͙̯̼͙←͇̤̹̙͎͖(̳̼͔͍⍳̫1↓̭̱͖̤͔̞͕⍴̬̟̘̯͓̤͍p͢ṯ̟̥̺̻͇s̭̻͈̟)̷̬̖͓̮̼~̩̩̻i̪͚̹̙̰̹ͅx̗̬̕0̤ ͚̗i͔̙̳̭x̟̫̕1̗̝̣̟͈̻̱ ̹̕ ̛̬̫ ҉͈ ̬̝͕͍ ͔̟̙̱͓ ̧͙͔ ͖͇ ̩̘̬̞̩ͅ ̭͕͉̤͉͡ ̤ ̵͍͓̳̭ͅͅ ̪͎̝
̙͙̣̪̜̝ ͕͚̦ ̠ ̰̮͠ ̢̠̮ ͟ ̗̦̬ ̮͉̟̫͓̪̩ ̶͔͓̣͚ ͚̦̹͓a̗̬̤̙̘͜ͅn͇̖̮̜̲̺g̩͕̠̘̰l̜̲͈̭͈e͓̼̬̟s̜̗←̱͔̤̀|̛̥̙͔(̵̦̟̟̘̗͕i̼͉̞̘̝̪͢x̪̯͘0̪͖̬͖̯́⊃̻̺͓̣̟̬v̞̭͎̩̮͠)̛-̨͖͖̙̦(͙͇͖̳̠͍̻⊂̡̝̠ǫţ̫̹̻h͉̥̹̥͕e̖̻̳r̥̩̞̼̟͙)̪͈̠̭⌷̛͚̟̭̜ṿ ͏̮̪͖ ̫̝̙ ̦̟ ̰̲ ̬͕͕ ̳͚ ͕̲̰͓̲̀ ̺͎̞̺̺̥̥͟ ̩͚̞̼̫̳͇͘ ̷̘̘͕̲̭͉ͅ
̢͙͉͙͍̻͖ ͖ ̻̜̮ ̜̝͡ ̳̩͕ ̮̜͡ ̷͎̦ ̝͓͓͖ ̻̝̳͉̩̰̬ ͜a͉̠̘ṉ̟̘̼g͚̱̠̖͉͍̟l̩ẹ͙͙̠̺̙s͉̠̼͔̰͖͉←̼{̥̺f̲͓͕̹̝←̫̲̯͉̩͚⍵̶̲͉͎̺>○͢1́ ̟̪ͅ⋄ ̣̞͎̬̣͡(̜̺̬͕͍⍵̹×̮͇~f̙͇͔͍͓)͖̮̯̘̰̯̙+͕̗̟͡f̨̲̳×̣̼̮̳̠-̲̩⍵̴̮̤-͏̻̺̠͈͔̜̦○̦2̥͇͔}҉͉͖̭̘̩̜a͓̥͠n̞̝̲͖̬̼̥͝g̞͙̦͍l̘̦͉̟ḛ͍s͔͡
̺̬͈̗̭̱ͅ ̶͎̗̖̰̘̟ ̗̺̣̺͔ ̨̙ ̘̣̲̹̜ ̲̥ ̠͘ ͍͎͙̼͓̲͜ ̡̰⍵͈͖,̻̮̠͇͞(̦̠̩͚̜̯an̠̜̯̭gl̷̝̦es̘̪⍳̢̪͈̘͙̯͍⌈̹͕̰̠͖̱͟/̣̹̟͈͈ͅa͖͝n͚̰̦͚g̛̗͔̖̬͖̩l͇̭e҉͓̲̠̦̭s̤)̻͙̫̲̺͜ͅͅ⊃̭̟͞o̫͇̣̲̖̝ṯ̰̭̹͔̜̘h̟̞͚͔e̱r̲̣̙͉̰ͅ ̸̙͚ ͙͙̱͔ ̬͚̱́ ̗ ̼̱̟̱̹̹͠ ̖͖̞͠ͅ ̣̠͟ ̰̜͙̬̬͈ ̢ ͓̭͖̼̥̩̻ ͉͍̼
͕͍̞͇ͅ ͏͈̺̳̰̙̻ ̦̲̖̩ ̘̗ ̵̟͙͚̟͙͙̥ ̭͈̻}͏̗̩̱͚ͅͅ⍣͕͚̲̣͚̤ͅ{͠
̛͇̲͇͖̻ ͉̝̥͟ ̡͇ ͙̕ ̥̰̲̪̫̣͍ ̵̫͚ ̛̠ ̭͈̦ ̭̖̮̫̬ͅ0͉͔̜͔̠̤=͔̭̤̻̺͕̳⊃̳̱́ͅ⌽͏̪̟͚͉̰̣⍺̠̺̝͈̟̙ ̬͍̣ ̨̰̙̣̩͉ ̹̤̺̜ ͈̺͍͓̬̯ ̤̼͘ ̸͙̹̭̻̣ ̷̫̫͚̞̰͚̟ ͡ ̴̣̝͍͍̺̹̦ ̴ ̠͎̼̩̲͖ ̙̙͎̗ ͓́ ̺̖͍̯ ҉ ̩̲̱͔̣͙̼͢ ̠̝͔̟͙̦͉ ͉ ̫͡ ̗́ ̻̹̟ ̶͈ ̷̫̤ ̵ ͖̬͈͍ ̗̯̼̤͈͙ ͏ ͕̳̙̻̻̬̭͝ ̱̲̘͙̱̪͟ ̛̘̠̼̮
̙̘̰͍̩͉ ̼̣̫͙̀ ̡̪̤ ͈ ̤͉ ͓̘}͕̻̩̪̪͉͞i̞̜x̖I̼n̡̝̝̰ç̮̞͓a̡͉͔̙n̪̠͓͔̫t͔͕̪
͡ ̧̫̮̬̜ ͕̺͕̞̺̖͞ ̀ ͏̘͈̥̹ ̣͙̣̘̦(̢̠̻̟⊂͕̞̹̬̠i̬̣̘̳̼̟͍x̲̬P̵e̙͖͉̻͚̼n̥̹̳̩̺̥t̬a̷͍̣͇̝ć̖̣̯ͅl͏e̯̫̖̱͇)̣̬͓ͅ⌷͕̰̫̬[̠͈̹̤̳͈1̮͍͖͎ͅͅͅ]̨̥̲͓̜̖ͅv͎͓̗̻̥͎į̯͚̫͖̺̭̝r͖͎̱̣̗g̹̺̫̳͕i̴n̢s̝̫͈̘̦͍
12 Likes
You’ve been talking with Charlie Stross again, haven’t you?
4 Likes
Oh wow, China Miéville will love this.
Elevated temperatures, for instance, are thought to
accelerate the life cycles of cephalopods,
provided the optimal thermal range of the
species is not exceeded and food is not
limited.
…and food is not
limited.
Cephalopods are pretty smart. When they run out of food in the oceans, they will look for it elsewhere, like on land, where there is a plentiful supply of tasty, tasty humans.
10 Likes
Best use of emoji I’ve seen lately. Have a trophy. 
3 Likes
There’s something deeply unsettling about these Big Changes. Starfish wasting disease, jellyfish blooms, coral bleaching, now octopus blume…
I don’t know what it all means, but it’s unlikely to be something we all like.
5 Likes
But great news for fishermen’s wives.
5 Likes
(Adds octopus to guilt free sushi list.)
3 Likes
And I imagine things will only get stranger more rapidly as we approach Jurassic levels of atmospheric CO2 at the end of the century. Such as the situation we had then, with oceans that are full of hydrogen sulfide and where there’s only enough oxygen to support life in the uppermost layer of the seas. It’s going to get very ugly (and stinky, given the hydrogen sulfide).
3 Likes
I, for one, welcome our new and delicious overlords
2 Likes
Yes, they can’t be considered bottom-feeders if they couldn’t have fought to it within their accelerated 1.5-year lifetime, and leapt mad distance into the kitchen.
(Some sushi pix at the Ars Technica forums. Whoa, a free read! Thanks, Cell!)
[Plans chain of restaurants with series of clear tubes at the entrance; circulating cumarin, 20-sided Rubik’s Cubes, and cephalopods.]
6 Likes
To suck, one tentacle at a time…
Right? And it’s not even latin, it’s Greek! It’d be octopodes!
I’m with @xemoka. I thought we agreed on octopodes.
Personally, if the ocean fills with tentacles, I hope we just eat them. Calamari, takoyaki, sliced raw on top of sushi rice…
Mom makes a nice octopie.
