Toilet designed to be uncomfortable to sit on, aimed at boosting employee productivity

In looking at the actual website for this abomination (https://standardtoilet.net/) they are also pitching it as a health item for the same reasons that the squatty potty claimed it’s 15 minutes a year or so ago.

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I’m pretty good at kicking and stomping. I doubt this thing could hold up to a focused attack. The porcelain itself will give out at some point.

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This. If my workplace installed one of these, I’m putting my shoes on the seat, and doing the “Asian pooping squat”, and not caring about the angle because I have ankles.

Screw any complaints about footprints on the seat.

But I have to wonder if this is even really necessary. When I worked in a large office building, the last thing you wanted to do was to spend any extra time in a bathroom. I have seen literal shit on the floor, a neatly curated pile of fingernails (or maybe toenails) more than once, fast food wrappers (seriously, people are eating in here?) among other horrors. Oh yeah, and once one of the guys from Sales peeing at a urinal with his pants around his knees, and bare butt to the wind. Pretty sure that the “water” in his desk water bottle, wasn’t.

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I just sit down if I’m drunk. No accounting for taste, I suppose.

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Oh, it wouldn’t. Give me ten minutes with a 20 oz framing hammer, a distinct disregard for the poor bastard that will have to clean it up, and a direct escape route and it’ll go down. (or possibly less time with a small 5 lb sledge…)

I dunno about more humane, but guillotines do seem much more efficient than other common execution methods of the time.

Can we sneak one into the White House? (Add an extra-large tank on back for those serial flushers.)

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Our company’s owner has literally said this, so yes, you are correct.

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Hehe, was about to post that.

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Toilet shim with integrated USB battery pack

It’s also @doctorow’s Adoption Curve of Crappy (in this case literally) Technology: hostile architecture first deployed against powerless homeless people now being rolled out against powerless workers.

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Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime
So I boingboing on company time

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I wish I made a dime for every dollar my boss made. I’d be living the dream.

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They already know It.

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When I worked in an open-plan office (I hated it) I couldn’t handle thinking through complex problems. Colleagues made fun of my body language and expressions when I was knitting my brows, so I got into the habit of extended toilet breaks - not to use the damn toilet, but to go somewhere private so I could bloody think on my own. So MY toilet breaks were to INCREASE my productivity. These damn bean-counters think we are all the same!

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Yeah, this is exactly what I was thinking. Even if I’m not intentionally going to the toilet to do some thinking, I think nearly everyone in a thinking job is going to be more productive with regular breaks than without them. Frequently the best way to get past a block is to walk away from it, even if just for a few minutes, and come back and look at it again.

Obviously people with jobs you wouldn’t call “thinking jobs” need breaks too and denying them breaks will make them less productive for other reasons. It’s just that when it comes to jobs where you are mostly being paid to think through problems, for many of us at least, the time we are taking breaks is our most productive time - I effectively get more done in the half hour that I’m getting ready for bed at night than I do in the 8 hours I’m “being productive.”

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Colleagues made fun of my body language and expressions when I needed a toilet break. Productivity of the whole office suffered.

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The guillotine replaced the breaking wheel, which you can still buy today.

Do you work in sales? (see above)

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