Heh. Lots of things can outrun us, but nothing that walks can outlast us…
3 Likes
Fuck Istanbul,I’m going to Corfu.
Wait nobody has gone wait not an endangered species, so ooops what was that bump?
3 Likes
Mine progenitrix had employ at a place where their lot was regularly besieged by turkeys.
My brother-in-law had a huge pet wild turkey (and a bunch of non-pet ones)… Old Tom intimidated a lot of visitors and neighbors just from his size and his love of seeing his reflection in car windows. He would pursue a few people, but never actually did anything aggressive. I enjoyed challenging him to drumming sessions…
When I was in highschool, one of our cross country practice runs took us through the territory of a gang of wild turkeys – they would chase people sometimes. The only injuries were to folks who decided to go through an old barbwire fence to avoid them.
The best defense is an aggressive chicken dance
17 Likes
Good thing for the explanation. Without context that gif might look a little strange.
2 Likes
I gotta great turkey story but I’m pretty drunk and it’s kinda long
7 Likes
Have you noticed you never see Donald Trump and the White House turkey in the same room at the same time? Suspicious minds want to know why.
2 Likes
I don’t know if wild turkeys will eat bread crumbs, but an old hack to incapacitate pigeons is to soak break crumbs in wine, throw them to the birds & when they pass out, pick them up & stuff them into a sack.
2 Likes
Oh man, I discovered yet another great use for left-over turkey: Fry into carnitas, serve in tacos!
1 Like
Wouldn’t recommend doing that on a campus. You are liable to alcohol poison a few frat bros.
“OH bread! Quick, bros, eat this to absorb the alcohol we are consuming.”
“Oh, bro. I am feeling pretty fucked up.”
“We need to eat more bread!” nom nom nom
Also - the turkey could be a mean drunk, and it will take more booze to get them to pass out than a pigeon.
2 Likes
“Us” being people who look like this, rather than the average person in the University of Michegan:
**
6 Likes
“He hasn’t hurt anybody, but he’s a very aggressive bird… He’s also created a traffic hazard because apparently he likes to lay down in the middle of the road and not move. It can be very difficult for the buses to get around him.”
Uh…a bus is a lot bigger and heavier than a turkey. Just sayin’.
3 Likes
Isn’t there some sort of annual festival in the U.S. specifically for dealing with these birds?
5 Likes
Someone sent him over from MSU - or else, it’s an alumni. Er…alumnus, I mean. I tend to have trouble with tenses.
1 Like
You can’t make a viable presidential campaign without breaking a few eggs.
Not a Latin scholar I take it.
Can’t they jam in the wheel-wells, causing trouble for the vehicle? A boyfriend of my sister flipped his car end over end after a raccoon wedged into the wheel, locking it up.
“My tire was thumping
I thought it was flat
So I stopped and took a look
And then I found your cat.
Sorry!”
(a proposed Hallmark card)
3 Likes
