Unicorn poop and squatty potties: the greatest viral ad in Internet history

“Finally”? We typically enjoy all of them together. My six- and eight-year-old were both big fans of the Dude Wipe one.

But I don’t think I need this. I’m 6’2", so with uncommon exceptions, most terlets are low enough that I’m already mostly squatting when I sit on them. And ask my family: I don’t never have no trouble poopin’ several times a day.

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It’s okay… have a hug.

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…but don’t squeeze too hard.

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I imagine it’s something like this?

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I cut down a cardboard box to the right height for me. Not quite as classy as injection molded plastic, but hey, the price was right! I saw them at a store and thought about buying one, but I am cheap.

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Depends, are those beats*(by dre) beets non-gmo, organically grown, farm to table, and washed with the purest of pure non-gmo farm to table organic water by virgin maidens who are born and raised for the explicit purpose of washing beets?

ETA - turns out the beets are also infused with THC, who knew?

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Wait a minute. . . Did you watch the video? Seems that if you’re doing it right, you’ll only have to poop ONCE a day! The whole point of the squatty potty thingie is to get it all out in one big go, ya know?

ETA: As for me, I’m fine with just one weird trick – eating lots of celery!

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I use one of these (or one very much like it at least). It folds flat and is cheap. I’m not sure where mine came from but they can be found for less than ten bucks.

http://www.amazon.com/Plastics-101-6-White-EZ-Foldz/dp/B000NOUQRA

Personally I prefer to do the Elmo shuffle (while singing "i’m takin’ a poop, i’m takin’ a poop…mixed in with a little scat) – burn a few calories and seems to really increase my download speed.

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Played it to my girls tonight, 5 & 7, they liked it but didn’t laugh as much as I did. But hey, I’ve been using their stools to adjust my posture for years at this stage, so it probably wouldn’t occur to them that posture fail is a thing.

Because i have to give out to them when they come into the toilet. When I’m on it. Privacy please. Please.

I have never had a problem pooping then I do eat loads of fruit.

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Uh… of course they are? How can you even question that?

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I’m fine with my good-sized Morning B.M., my 3:00 Constitutional, and my Evening Crapola. Combining them into one daily megadump would be a horrorshow; they’re substantial and satisfying enough as it is.

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Okay, I hope you realize that it’s entirely too easy to visualize that with this li’l face:

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It bothers me that no one is selling this as the “stool stool,” but at least the ad made that joke in passing (ha!).

I just put a foot on either side of the toilet seat and squat. But there’s no unicorn puppet for pants-off toilet balancing.

Y’know, I haven’t spontaneously thought of the phrase ‘so much win’ in a long time.

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I have just two questions: Are you a horse? Or are you an elephant?

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Rye bread + fruit + correct flora in gut + oats + chillies = never stopped to think whether the train needs encouragement.

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Sort-of kind-of do this squat thing already. Just sit with fists under thighs.

Gonna wash my hands anyway, so why not use 'em?

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Now I’m imagining someone doing that pommel-horse move–an L sit, IIRC–on the toilet.

I’ve got no regrets.

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