US Army developing the first tactical bra in its history

Canadian Smh GIF by CBC

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Given the…somewhat unfortunate context…of how that particular atoll came to public attention at the right time; I think that bikinis have the strongest claim to ‘strategic’.

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This has historically been the case and given the plethora of “tactical” wear on sale these days it seems to be true still.

Well there are Wellington’s of course.

Alas, also military. Sailors you know.

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And bluchers.

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Well tactical nukes are for small areas or critical infrastructure. Strategic nukes are for large areas or to deny the use of an area to the enemy.

So I guess it could be a toss-up

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frau-blucher-gif-4

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And the general gist is that tactics are for specific engagements, operations or actions, while strategy involves a larger scope or overall aim. So what bra you choose for a given activity is chosen for some tactical advantage in that situation, while what bras you have available to you in your arsenal are chosen for strategic reasons having to do with their tactical relevance.

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With nukes there’s also a lot of euphemism and implied theory of escalation; in addition to any distinctions drawn purely on size or area.

‘Strategic’ has a habit of meaning ‘specced for major population centers’; and of being applied to anything that would probably cause WWIII if used.

‘Tactical’ normally signals that the purpose is military formations or infrastructure and (in the hands of optimists) sometimes implies a belief that use would not trigger escalation.

image

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The distinction in my training: Tactical nukes are for destroying grid squares. Strategic nukes are for destroying map sheets.

Anyway it was an attempt to make a throwaway joke about bras. I’m content to leave it at that

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“The co says that there’s a risk of incendiary weapons today, but my electronic warfare bra gives better support. Which one should I wear today? Decisions decisions…”

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Designing this type of bra is a genuine challenge. Breasts move on multiple axis, and using simple compression to hold them becomes very uncomfortable very quickly. This is just one paper looking at the problem.

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I’m thinking that the lieutenants with the keys in the Launch Control Centers might disagree.

Well jeans started out as work clothes for miners and other blue collar workers, but they were popularized as casual wear because navy bell-bottomed dungarees were available cheap from surplus stores.

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Not necessarily. Streetwear ‘cycling shorts’ have very little in common with shorts designed for riding bike. The cut’s different; streetwear shorts don’t have built-in braces to keep them up the way bikewear does and bikewear shorts have a pad for cushioning and abrasion prevention which you don’t find in streetwear because it’s unnecessary and looks and feels pretty silly when you’re walking around.

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Right? I mean women in the US Army is such a recent development…

I just hope they won’t be weighing in on how many tactical bras will be needed:

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You remind me that Russian generals have demonstrated why it’s a really, really bad idea to actually take your personal phone into a war zone. No need for that pocket, especially under tactical clothing.

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Huh, I wondered if that work was being done at the Army labs in the town where I live and it looks like from the address on their webpage that it is. Another project they were involved in was the pizza MRE. Here’s another article with a taste test of the MRE.

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The article seemed seemed determined to be bureaucratically anodyne. “Touch Points” indeed. (Task and Purpose’s article, while informative, seemed aware that its primary audience was male and puerile.)

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