Utah neighborhood uses decoy packages on porch to discourage thieves


#1

[Read the post]


#2

I suspect the thieves will just start carrying box cutters and checking.


#3

Oh, those wacky Mormons, assuming everyone is as ethical as they aspire to be.

Guess they don’t know each other as well as they thought they did.


#4

I’m picturing loading the box with a large spring connected to a pie.


#5

It’s about damn time. They’ve played straight in to my hands!

/runs out to steal a box of rocks


#6

Who exactly do they think the thieves are? Are there roving gangs of “outsiders” that sneak in the community at night? Is it that green, grinchy fellow that lives atop the pointy mountain outside of town?

Maybe your 15,000 neighbors aren’t as infallible as you think.


#7

I’ve never been there, but it looks like Daybreak is just a master-planned community built by a commercial developer – no particular religious or community focus, so I would expect the neighborliness to be just like any other suburb. Perhaps even less so, since it is new.


#8

That would be a terrific thing to do with coffins too. Although I think Jack Handey had a point about making your skeleton scary.


#9

I have a hunch someone just started this fad so they’d have an excuse not to clean off their porch.


#10

“The idea is that thieves will steal them, take them home to find they’ve got garbage instead of shiny new products, and swear off stealing other people’s stuff for good.”


#11

I’m sure they’ll enjoy getting those rocks back through their windows.


#12

Next week’s headline: Frustrated thieves return decoy rocks. Through victim’s windows.

edit: Curse you ninja @daneel!


#13

What a wasted opportunity. Put a GPS tracker in there and send the cops. You could even load it up with some cheap, but new-looking electronics so the thieves are lulled into keeping the object for a little while.


#14

I was hoping for this:

http://imgur.com/li83yDu

But their idea works too


#15

“Some” of them want to catch the thieves? Only some?
Here’s one: Fasten a box to the porch so that when a thief tries to move it, he throws out his back. Then shoot the bastard while he’s writhing on the ground. Or perhaps save time with a booby-trapped box.
Sometimes, you have to think outside the… Uh, box.


#16

and swear off stealing other people’s stuff for good.

It sounded good right up to that point, Underpants Gnomes.


#17

Why worry with rocks or old electronics? If MOST of the people put a bunch of empty boxes (or with enough in them not to blow away) out on their porch, then the thieves would have to waste time (during which they might be caught) checking boxes on each porch in the hope of finding boxes that were actually worth stealing.

It might look a little junky, but if every single house had 2-3 boxes sitting on the porch, I think it would be pretty frustrating for the thieves (unless, of course, they simply watched which packages UPS delivered, which would stop the whole ‘weighted boxes’ thing too). Hopefully tailing the delivery trucks is too visible and time-consuming.


#18

How in the hell did you get from “neighborhood thieves” to “FUCKING MORMONS, AMIRITE”?


#19

My parents live just a mile or 2 away from Daybreak. There is no “tight-knit community” aspect about it. As others have noted (plus some additional info) this is Kennecott (as in the massive hole in the ground a few miles West) land that is being redeveloped as master planned communities. I’d guess that the only substantive difference from my parent’s area would be that Daybreak has some community amenities like a fitness center (and probably HOA to fund these things).


#20

#Which is worst (Gyp the Blood, or Hearst) ?

  • FUCKING MORMONS, AMIRITE
  • FUCKING CHICOGOANS, AMIRITE

0 voters