Everything I want costs money.
18 Likes
Along with other natural fibresâŚ
15 Likes
Plus put some lies on there. A good CV should always contain at least one lie.
11 Likes
Pruning rosebush vines requires more patience than I normally have. If you try to rush, the thorns have a way of making you slow the fuck down. You have to work at its pace.
12 Likes
âPatent holder on salmon nigiri.â
9 Likes
Btw, uh, ya know, if you ever need to make a cough packed fractioning column, you learn that fast.
6 Likes
Youâre lucky that didnât turn into a full on barf-o-rama.
4 Likes
A political org in the Middle East is advocating that villagers plant trees. (Yay!) That org is the Taliban. (Hrrrm.)
11 Likes
23 Likes
The usual then.
12 Likes
Because bed is comfy!
(Itâs all about the duvet, man)
4 Likes
We had a party last night. I had 3/4 of a beer and Iâve spent the whole day today feeling like I have a terrible hangover. I didnât even get to enjoy getting drunk.
20 Likes
Iâm 43 and donât own a pair of pants that donât have a hole in them.
And itâs all my fault.
25 Likes
Thatâs good though. I tried pants without holes in them, turns out theyâre actually really difficult to put on.
28 Likes
17 Likes
Gotta hole in the top. 
Vent: I am sick to death of cheap, lousy, crappy food. Imma blow the budget for this week and get myself some crunchy greenery and eat something with some actual texture. 
14 Likes
Iâve been thrown up on once. Crashing at a friendâs place â bunch of people sleeping on living room floor. I was dreaming someone was pouring water on my head. Woke up and it was actually my friend vomiting on my face.
19 Likes
Umm, my Like is more an expression of sympathy than me actually liking what happened. Ewww. 
19 Likes
Rest of story: Once I figured out what was happening I jumped out, starting shouting âshower time!â repeatedly, ran to the shower where I myself threw up. After that I returned to the living room and happened to notice the door to the garage was open which was odd. Not as odd as what Iâd see next â my friend urinating into my friendâs momâs Cadillac. When I yelled at him to stop he just shushed me. Then he passed out on the hood. Ahh ⌠the mid 90s.
16 Likes
I just had a client ask me if I could come in at 6AM tomorrow, instead of 8AM tomorrow. This was at 10PM, just now. What the fâthagn? You are going to see me in 10 hours, and you want it to be 8 hours? And you tell me by text? Whaaaaaaat?
I know what tomorrow will be like, This client has provided me with someone at the space (probably the seller, god I hate working for the seller) who is going to be non-cooperative and dodgy, and that should just be a real hoot. Some of you may suspect how well I suffer fools and being misled.
On the other hand, utterly professional demeanor, and I can do my work in 2-3 hours, or not do it in 8. I am billing by the hour tomorrow, whenever I get there. Probably 7. damnit.
8 Likes
