So… you’re disappointed, then?
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Shit, can you imagine how tired Black people are about certain words…?
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How nice for you.
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Right?
Or Latino folks, or Trans folks, or disabled folks…
I’m sure we all have a nice lengthy list of genuinely offensive words that we are sick and tired of having attributed to or associated with us…
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Would you like to speak to our manager?
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He could write a letter…
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Sure it does.
“Those people don’t belong in this building! C’mon, you know we were all really thinking it!”
Right. He’s not a racist, he’s an asshole. An asshole and a racist. And a misogynist.
An asshole and a racist and a misogynist and a racist.
And a loser if there ever was a loser.
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Give POC the benefit of the doubt or get the fuck out.
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Just going to take a moment to plug Eric Andre’s new movie Bad Trip. It has an extended riff on White Chicks.
The movie is dumb AF but arguably in the right way, my wife and I were cracking up at just how dumb and funny it was.
I know you’re trying to make a positive contribution here, but I think it goes deeper than just giving the benefit of the doubt.
Giving the benefit of the doubt* implies there is some rational basis for doubt, but it should be ignored in the absence of confirmatory evidence. It still implies that doubt is an acceptable default state. While that may reduce the number of these sorts of incidents, it doesn’t deal with the core systemic racism. If it’s white people in the gym, he’s treating them like humans, but if it’s black people he’s having to “give them the benefit of the doubt”. When I enter a gym, I just assume everyone has a right to be there and I don’t have to tamp down a nagging doubt about anyone.
So VKK may not call the cops on a few guys sharing his gym, but it doesn’t deal with his racist tendencies. It will (and has) manifested itself in other ways.
It’s different than a default state of trust/humanity (for lack of a better way of putting it). It doesn’t deal with the problem that too many white folk are uncomfortable and untrusting of people that look different from them. The only way this gets solved is white folk (myself included) start to recognize the basic humanity of every human being.
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Okay boomer.
"His: gym? Really?
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That stream of corporate speak BS barely makes sense anyway. I’m frankly shocked at the lack of the word “synergy”.
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Why is it so hard to treat other people with respect? The guys he reported were just minding their own business. There was absolutely no reason for this guy to do anything but assume they were fellow gym members.
It’s totally reasonable for the landlord to terminate his lease for attacking his fellow tenants like this.
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It’s a common expression which is not really about doubt the way you seem to be interpreting it. It’s more about assuming the people you encounter are acting in good faith, or acting as if you assume so at the very least. Basically how “white” people treat other “white” people in America. What I was really trying to say (although it didn’t rhyme as nicely) is that we must aggressively extend EXCESS benefit of the doubt to POC, above and beyond what you may consider your preferred state of colorblindness at the gym. Given that nobody is free from even subconscious biases, we must vigilantly and actively guard against their influence by erring on the side of excess compassion.
ETA: For instance, my preschool daughter and I do a lot of adventuring on a network of urban bike trails in an undeniably “white” space. I DGAF about making other “whites” feel comfortable in their own space, but if I pass a POC I go out of my way to smile/nod/say hi in an effort to make them feel as comfortable as possible, because I know for a fact that many of the “whites” around me are doing the exact opposite. I know it’s rather meaningless in the big picture, just an example of what I am trying to convey.
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Yeah, couldn’t have happened to a nicer man…
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Technically correct. A nicer man wouldn’t have pulled this shit.
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Sure, I think we are disagreeing over the nuance about what “giving the benefit of the doubt” means - I think it’s typically used when one decides to go along with a decision or situation, even when they have suspicions or doubts. However, I can see that your interpretation is closer to what I was describing (i.e. assuming the best in people).
Absolutely - though I’d caution that excess compassion could also come across as weirdness and make the situation uncomfortable in a different way. If VKK had walked into the gym and instead started being chummy with them, that may also have made the situation awkward (e.g. why is this white dude being so friendly with us?). I can only speculate of course. But if it’s about making people comfortable then one also needs to calibrate to the situation (and be yourself - if you’re normally outgoing, great; if you normally keep to yourself, also fine).
Acknowledging someone’s humanity is never meaningless. It may sound hopelessly naive and new-agey but if everyone treated everyone with dignity the world would be a better place to live.
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Yes, I should have written “the” gym (you’ll note the preceding paragraph didn’t use the possessive). I didn’t mean it in the sense that he owns it, only in the sense it was the gym that he attends, much like one may refer to a pub they frequent as “my local”. All the same, it goes to show that we should choose words carefully and be conscious of how others might interpret them.
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I like Bret.
