Video compares size of movie monsters

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/01/29/video-compares-size-of-movie-m.html

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Why didn’t I spot any of the TGOP’ers among them?

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Okay, but how tall is Franky without the shoes?

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My only quibble is that it needed OG Godzilla in it.

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Meh. Its an ok video, but I thought monsters in Hollywood where measured on the Weinstein scale, which is about 6ft = 1 Weinstein. So King Kong is about 8.2 Weinsteins tall.

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Okay, at this point I’m assuming that people are still calling Frankenstein’s Monster “Frankenstein” just to troll everybody.

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Why didn’t it start with something much smaller, like the virus from ‘Outbreak’ or something along those lines?

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Well, the entire video as it stands only spans a little over 3 orders of magnitude. Finding examples of movie monsters to smoothly fill the gaps between 400 nanometers (the largest virus) and 0.7 meters would be challenging, to say the least.

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Dude, nobody says “I’m going to get McDonald’s hamburgers”, they say “I’m going to get McDonald’s.” The good ship Synecdoche has sailed; the monster is called Frankenstein now.

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Since the monster is considered the doctor’s “son,” wouldn’t it also be a Frankenstein?

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Wait, so was the Bride of Frankenstein also Frankenstein?

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Well, the original 1935 film casts the same actress metonymically as both Mary Shelley and the Bride. One might therefore argue that the Bride (like Shelley) would have taken her husband’s name. One the other hand, one might imagine the Bride as a feminist and political radical (again, like Shelley) who might not have agreed to take her husband’s name.

However, I would argue that since the Bride rejected the Monster, and the marriage was not consummated, that all such married-name arguments are specious, and that the Bride’s surname would effectively have been Frankenstein for the same reason the Monster’s was: because she, too, was created by the Doctor.

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“Tonight on Jerry Springer…!”

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The virus from Andromeda Strain, The Blob (starts off pretty small…), the little troll that lives in the wall in Cats Eye, CHUDs, Chucky, and somewhere in between you can fill in with the variety of Killer Beefsteak Tomatoes.

Might impede the flow and theme, but accuracy and completeness for the win?

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Add Gremlins, the little fat blobs from Doctor Who, and a newborn baby xenomorph.

ETA: Looks like the video only covers movies, not TV.

So, tell me again how the upcoming “Godzilla v Kong” movie will work? The current Gojira is 3X taller than Kong, probably outweighs him 9X, and has atomic breath. It’s like me fighting my three-year-old grandson.

And yes, I have atomic breath.

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If not then calling it Frankenstein’s monster is insulting, rendering an obviously thinking, feeling creature into a mere object.
People are the real monsters here.

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One lucky punch/kick by your grandson in the nuts and you’ll go down like, uh, something that goes down fast and ends up in a crumpled heap on the floor.
I’ve seen this a couple of times. It’s never pretty.
The worst are little kids whose shoulder height is roughly at an adult’s groin height.
Seriously, wear a cup.

Even the wolfman has nards…

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Critters?

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