Watch Kellyanne Conway’s excruciating stand-up routine from the ’90s


#1

Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2017/01/26/watch-kellyanne-conways-exc.html


#2

Conway’s current comedy routines are much more nuanced, I agree. She is so good at satire that you almost think she believes the crazy things she says.


#3

Clicked in at random somewhere near the beginning and she was saying “I have a congenital deformity…”

I instantly thought… "In the conscience!"
Not funny but fast, eh?

(Ba-dum tish, try the veal. etc.)


#4

That was funnier than what she actually said.


#5

Surprisingly so, she ain’t funny.


#6

meh. Everyone sucks at standup, except a handful of standups. Politicans are a particularly bad match, not everyone can be Obama or Franken. Kellyanne Conway (Man I keep accidentally typing Kelly Conaboy …man I wish she were the whatever Kellyanne is.) can eat a pile of shit, but I don’t really care about her jokes.


#7

As they say - “Dying is easy, comedy is hard.” She’s certainly dying up there.


#8

Is there a German word for being embarrassed for another?


#9

I don’t care that she’s not funny. She still scares the shit out of me.


#10

Fremdschämen


#11

No.

<seriously, no>


#12

watch what/who? seriously? there are more entertaining train wrecks out there.


#13

I watched this mess so y’all don’t have to.

I don’t think she understands the structure of a joke at all. She telegraphs all her punchlines, which even if delivered well aren’t really punchy enough to be punchlines. Her punchlines have the pattern of deviating slightly from the setup, but not nearly enough to be clever or amusing. A good punchline turns the setup on its head. Hers turn it a little onto its right buttcheek so it can let out a little fart.

Most of her “jokes” are just name-dropping. I’m sure the Beltway insider audience finds the material mildly relatable and mildly relevant, but judging from the tense hostage-situation laughter, probably not. The whole “pundette” thing (female pundit?) is something she obviously made up and it was clear that nobody there knew what the hell she was talking about. Most of the rest of the jokes came across like wedding speech filler material nicked from the internet.

This was so bad I felt genuinely unnerved after a couple minutes. Judging by the smattering of tense nervous laughter, I wasn’t the only one.


#14

Her opener was ok, it was certainly tailored for her audience. So that’s not the worst.

So at conflict with myself here.

Ok, that’s a ten minute set. I don’t know where someone at this level gets ten minutes but that pisses me right the fuck off.

Is she looking at notes? Is this a fucking mic? A ten minute fucking mic??? Ok, she said her leg is broken so maybe she’s on pills for the pain.

The irony is that as someone currently battling against women she probably got her spot because she is a woman. Standup is the worst sausage fest outside of a bathhouse. The shitty environment keeps so many actually talented women away that no-talents will and do get passed for shows, better spots on mics, longer sets, etc. because promoters have so few women to draw from on the lower levels that if they don’t put a hack on they will have an all-male revue.

That having been said, it still takes ovaries to go up even if you are hopped up on pills.


#15

She just delivered the biggest joke of all time all the way to the White House!

It’s just not one of those “ha ha” jokes. More like a “weep in disgust and horror” jokes.


#16

#Watch Kellyanne Conway’s excruciating stand-up routine from the ’90s


#17

As a woman in engineering…welcome to my world. This is what happens all the time. The least competent woman (generally a pretty one) gets promoted to the top and then that’s why we can’t have nice things.


#18

My ex was a structural engineer, but she had to get out. Too much stress.


#19

Charity event. D.C.'s Funniest Celebrity. So I doubt she was eating into someone like Ali Wong’s time.

That said, letting her on stage was charity.


#20

To be fair, even Louis C.K.'s stand up from the 90s is schlock…