WATCH: women steal new lawn

And it will be all to no avail. Don’t they realise that they’ll be leaving their footprints in the soily substances, or undercoat, or whatever technical term? I believe the local police have a specialist forensic force to help identify perps from this sort of evidence. The Third Lancashire Foot Regiment or something.

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Now, hey. We’ve had TWO WHOLE MONTHS of dry weather! If the government didn’t have so much other distractory bullshit to play with, it would have been a state of emergency!

You’re questioning the director’s artistic integrity? For shame, you philistine.

What with their heads always getting stuck in the fence…

Wow. Who knew grass could make a person so angry?

4 reasons people might use the stuff:

  1. Underlying ground has just been cleared. Planting turf makes it hard for anything you don’t want to grow

  2. Grass is in such a high-traffic area that growing from seed is impossible

  3. Sporting fields

  4. To make the chrome on my lambo really pop

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Schenck? Thought it said “Shmuck.”

I’m calling it a prank by the neighbors. They actually have a look at the video camera in the process too, and don’t care about it.

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