Woman in wench costume captures sword thief at Colorado Renaissance Festival


#1

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#2

Oh Connor Ward, of the Colorado, hang thy head in all that is SHAME!


#3

Alcohol may have been involved. Some guys can’t handle their mead.


#4

What, no jokes about throwing a wench into his plans? No innuendos about why he needed to steal a sword?

Sheesh.


#5

That guy’s got the face of an NPC if I’ve ever seen one.


#6

Those hand made swords get pretty pricy. I freaking hate thieves.


#7

Tiss true, tiss true dear friend!


#8

Classic case of the guy who rolls for a Rogue or a Thief, then won’t play as one.

Here’s a protip Fafhrd: You run the wench through, then steal a horse and ride away. In for a penny in for a fucking pound.

/Chaotic-good in the streets, Lawful-evil in the sheets.


#9

Handed him over to the police? Does this festive not have stockades?


#10

Of course…but they charge $15.95 for the picture.


#11

He shall be apprenticed to be the finest sword swallower… at thee county jail.


#12

[quote=“logruszed, post:8, topic:61708”]
Lawful-evil in the sheet
[/quote] would mean something like - after orgasm rolling over and saying “Since it’s my house you can get out now”


#13

If my name was Connor and I saw a sword laying about I would feel obligated to steal it.


#14

No kidding. I made a sword once. At scout camp. We had a steel folding chair, an electric air pump for inflatable mattresses, bigass campfire, some big rocks, and NO ADULT SUPERVISION. We made that steel folding chair into one helluva sword.

Still brings a tear to my eye, the night we spent melting down a folding chair into a sand-based ingot mold, then pounding the fuck out of that little bar of metal.

Anyway, I was the one who ended up with the “sword” since it was my impulsive idea to melt down our camp’s only chair. And I walked into my mall’s local knife and sword shop to get a quote on it. There was a small, bland, uninspired (but hand made) dagger over the door. No fancy adornments, nothing really special except it was made by human hands. And it was about $1200. The shop guy (who literally sounded like Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons) said he’d pay me to get out of his shop.


#15

I always wanted to be a pickpocket at a renaissance fair.
Just to add a little versamillatude.An illitrate pickpocket that smells like shit.
Drunk! Filthy.Irreverent.


#16

Lawful evil in the sheets, to me, means that most transgressive of acts: Not reciprocating oral sex.


#17

I think lawful evil implies something like saying you refuse to do it because your religion forbids it (especially if you are a high ranking member of that religion). chaotic evil could just refuse to do it. What are the lawful evil sex habits? Droit de seigneur, I guess, but what else.


#18

I’m not sure… I mean, rape is obviously chaotic evil. Most sex acts are chaotic good because sex is fun and has such potential for spontaneity. Lawful good sex is obviously plain old missionary exclusively for procreation. So… Lawful evil… Maybe… Requiring women to wait 72 hours and have an unnecessary and invasive trans-vaginal ultrasound while the doctor tells legally-sanctioned lies to her? As far as I can tell, those are evil laws…


#19

You’re taking a lot of the fun outa bein’ evil


#20

I think that is probably lawful evil sex, lawful good sex would be following the laws of your land while enjoying the sex.