He didn’t get it wrong, though; she told him what looked good to her, and the ‘date’ intentionally ignored her wishes and ordered what he wanted to eat for both of them.
They’ve read every piece of advice on dating, but refuse to try ‘listen and respect.’
It’s been a while, but if I remember correctly, figuring out what my date liked was most of the fun,anyway.
I’m with Mindy and Melz - if someone is this obnoxious, walk away. Maybe run.
From the clip, it looks like he drove them both to the restaurant.
It really is like that line in the Gambler; know when to hold 'em, fold 'em, and when to get the unhappy fuck out of Dodge.
A guy like that ain’t gonna get more tolerable as time progresses…
They are reading the incel dating advice which explicitly advocates for treating women like this. So, they did read plenty of dating advice, based on misogynistic ideas.
It’s all there, including a little “negging” about the calories, the false confidence, the attempt to take charge and take control. Gross.
This audio was terrifying. I was legit worried for her safety.
Where did the “nice guy” label came from? Do guys this like self-identify as “nice” guys?
I’m not sure if this is just incel, although they have definitely grabbed and used it. It’s been around way too long for that. I think incel implies a newish trend when this is born of deeply ingrained misogyny that’s been passed around for a long f’in time. Or really… I wish this sort of behavior felt isolated to a single group of people.
They do. It’s a BS pose where nerds claim to be “nice guys” (unlike those brutes and jocks over there), behave just like you see here (because they don’t like or are scared of women), and then whinge that they’ve been rejected because they’re nice guys. Amanda Marcotte was talking about them more than a decade ago.
The NiceGuys™ pull directly from the incel handbook these days – it’s all they know. “Wahhh, I’m a supreme gentleman. Look how I ordered for milady at the restaurant! Why won’t women sleep with me? I’ll show them!”
Yes, all the time; to the point that when any unfamiliar man starts off by referring to himself as “a Nice Guy,” it immediately sets off the first red flag for women like myself.
People who are actually nice (ie, compassionate, respectful and kind) generally DONT feel the need to verbally signify - it shows in their consistent behavior.
It most certainly is.
Been around for a bit, long enough to be a thing that is widespread, and it aligns with MRA and PUA movements too.
Given that he’s using the exact lines they advocate, then yeah, it’s in part motivated by that.
Not sure why you’d deny it, given how he’s following that playbook exactly.
Jesus Fucking Christ. This guy. Has he ever had a 2nd date ever? Did he ever stop to think he might be the problem?
Let’s hope not.
See (again, I’ve been out of this pool for 25 years), I thought NiceGuy™ was that particular strand of idiocy that “I’m generally in your orbit and not actively an asshole, therefore you owe me sex” – where as this guy is just an asshole.
I thought the particularly insidious things about NiceGuy™ was they just sort of seethe passive aggressively that the women over whom they pine/stalk/obsess are attracted to men they are actually attracted to…
Closet cases are the real problem here… /s
I’m not saying this dude isn’t a shit or that there aren’t all kinds of shits out there, I’m just saying I understood the term “NiceGuy” to be a narrower term of art.
Start a new thread; otherwise it might derail this one.
Again, the point here is the woman in question and her shitty-ass excuse for a date.
Misogyny; we’re soaking in it.
The title of her post implies that, at some point before the date, he presented himself (perhaps using those very words) as a “nice guy”. That’s how these kinds of dweebs always start things out. That’s why they get the ™ symbol: it’s an attempt to self-brand.
That’s not to say that they’re also not passive-aggressive arseholes with the potential to be stalkers. That’s also not to say they don’t try and use the shoddiest PUA techniques.
They seethe that way because they erroneously conclude that if a woman rejects a nice guy like him she’s secretly attracted to obviously abusive jerks, when in fact she’d probably just like to date the sort of kind and respectful man who doesn’t feel the need to preface the date with an announcement that he is one.
Are you saying that the nice guy types are closet cases? Because that’s what I got out of your comment. Please feel free to clarify.
Either way, the problem is misogyny. End of reason for the problem.
Only that I had understood the term to apply to closet cases. Anyway, I’m just going to note that this guy is a fuck and I’m sorry that women have to suffer from this kind of nonsense.